Can't Take My Eyes Off You - Monika x Male Reader

Cover - Chapter 11

Cover was always something Y/N shied away from. He hated feeling weak and vulnerable, and needing cover was an admission of weakness. Admittedly, that wasn't the healthiest way of thinking about it, but Y/N couldn't help himself. The only time he embraced cover was when he watched the horizon back home. Even then he stopped hiding after a few months.

He remembered the routine:

Leave school, take a right instead of a left. It was the longer route home.

Walk along the coastline. Find a good spot and sit down.

Watch.

Keep watching.

After a while, stand up and go home.

When no one else held him, the horizon did. The rain did. The elements surrounded him in the most comforting of embraces. He was scared of the rain first; too loud, too harsh, too aggressive. Over time he came to see the beauty behind it, and the rain always came from the horizon inwards. It was like a gift chosen and presented for him specifically. No one else loved the rain like he did. So after a month or two he stopped hiding under bus stops and trees and just sat on that pebble beach, getting soaked in the rain.

Then the routine changed:

Leave school whenever, probably miss a lesson.

Sprint to the coastline.

Sit in the rain, watch the horizon.

Maybe smoke or eat something.

After a while, stand up and go home.

He got ill very often from sitting in the rain, but grew almost immune to it after a year or so. His parents would always scold him for coming home drenched and sick. God knows what they thought he was up to; coming home with a gravelly voice, shivering and dripping water, reeking of cigarettes or dampness but the biggest of smiles on his face. He lied to them of course, said the school just had a big smoking problem amongst its students. I mean, it was technically true.

His fondness for the rain made him very quickly reject cover. Maybe he really did hate being spoken down to. Was he that prideful? Was it even pride? Who knows. Either way, being shielded made him retrospectively more upset than if he were just left alone. He never reached out when his mental health crumbled, never spoke to anyone when he had a panic attack, and most certainly never asked for help. The rain was far more helpful than any person ever was, so why bother? Today was a change of events.

Y/N wasn't planning on having a panic attack, but even if he knew it were approaching he never wanted any of the girls to see him like that. So weak, so fragile, so pitiful. As fate would have it, all four of them had seen him and were now walking him home to play doctor. Not only that, but Monika was covering his ears. Cover. Y/N shuddered at the word.

So why did it feel so good when Monika did it?

Was this the Monika Effect again? Did his crush sway his feelings? Most probably, yes, but his relationships with other people have never impacted his relationship with cover like this had. Y/N thought it to be a ghastly thing. Yet here he was, being held up by Monika, her soft hands gently cupped around his ears to protect his dainty little eggshell of a mind from the loud noises of afternoon rush hour in central Tokyo. It felt so good. Celestial. Like an angel were cradling him. How did she do this? How did she do this to him? Was Monika magical? She felt magical, like she had some intimate control over his emotions without either of them realising it. Both Y/N and Monika were very aware of the effect they had on one another, but even this subconscious little action of affection was making him feel lightheaded. Any action Monika did felt perfect, coordinated, planned and intricately designed to make Y/N's stomach do backflips. Usually Y/N would call this intentional. However, a simple act like this was not some carefully plotted scheme to flirt with him like Monika was now known to pull occasionally. He had really fallen for her, hadn't he? He'd never felt this strongly about a person before.