Frostbite

Chapter Seventeen - Forgiveness

The search for Felix had put the DSO in full-ready mode, I had yet to see my dad for a few days now, which concerned me a bit.Aaron had been introducing me to the DSO dynamics, along with the training routine of the members, it was so exciting! I honestly felt like it was a dream, the only thing that made the dream turn nightmarish was the fact my friend, one of the closest friends I had was missing.Stephanie had finally recovered from the gassing attack, and the DSO was allowing me to visit her today. I couldn't help but feel nervous like something in my gut was wrong.I slowly walked through the hallways of the DSO patient ward, I had adorned the DSO navy blue and black, and my pace was a snail's speed.

Stephanie had been through so much torment, her neighborhood being attacked because of me leading Mr. Thomas through it, and him attacking the academy, her sister being taken, Stephanie deserved a break of some kind, and I felt obligated to attempt and give her that break. I slowly walked to the door Aaron had told me Stephanie was in, room zero-five. I stood there, hesitant to open the door, the flooding doubtful thoughts made my arms weigh hundreds of pounds.

Full of regret, I sighed, glancing at the clock on the hallway wall that held the door. 9:00 am. I decided to step away from the door for a moment, walking to the opposite wall, sitting on the floor with my back leaned against it, watching the door.The door was the same shade as the walls, separated with a black trim. The doorknob was made of silver, with no lock. Would Stephanie want some food? I wondered softly, staring at the door as if trying to pull information about her from it with my eyes.

Her room is so quiet. Maybe she's still asleep? I felt a pang of guilt tug at my damaged heartstrings. It felt like one strong pull with a slightly sharp object could break it.I felt so much guilt, I felt like my pain was infecting those I love around me. I never had a chance to properly process and move on from my trauma, and now my determination to fix things that I believe I did wrong was hurting those who care about me.

Soon I felt tears well in my eyes, they burned with dehydration. I slowly reached for the water bottle I had stashed in the blue windbreaker jacket they had given me. I unzipped the pocket shakily, took out the water bottle, unscrewed the lid, and took a swig of water. The taste of plastic had seeped into the drink, but I didn't care, water was water.

Would she even want to see me? The question smacked me hard across the face, like a vicious slap. Honestly, a slap would have been more kind than the heartbreak that question did on my mind. Stephanie had done no wrong, she had been nothing but a friend to me, a confidant. Stephanie let me into her life without question, she trusted in fate, and that fate had placed me in her life for a reason.

Oh, to be as trusting as Stephanie, my life would be far more forgiving. I slowly stood back up, trying to gather my courage to open the door that stood in front of me like a golem. The door, despite being an inanimate object, felt far more intimidating than most doors. It's just a door! Open it!  I could hear my brain telling me.

I slowly approached the door, reaching out my hand nervously to open it. I got a grip on the cold silver doorknob, before realizing I should probably knock. I raised my left hand and gently knocked a pattern to her, biting my lip in uncertainty. "Hello?" A soft voice came from inside the room. "Who is it?"

I froze like the words were ripped from my tongue before I could even utter them. "I-It's Kerran." I stammered out nervously, closing my eyes like I was about to get hit with a yell to leave.The silence felt like eons, but it was most likely ten seconds when I heard her speak. "Come in." I reluctantly turned the doorknob and pushed open the door, peeking around to see her. Stephanie was in a blue outfit matching mine, her braids had been taken out, along with the lime green extensions, and neatly brushed into and intertwined into twists. Stephanie's gaze was relaxed like she had just woken up from a deep and relaxing sleep.