Tethered

Chapter 11: Trust and Danger✔️

Waking up is surreal.

I can feel him in me, almost like another existence in my body, in my mind, my soul.

I feel the need to touch him, to be closer, to form a more secure bond, a bond that should feel wholly complete after last nights activities.

I have a feeling the loss of magyk in me is stopping us, is hindering our bond from snapping into place correctly. I miss my magyk. I feel so useless, so defenseless without it.

They confiscated all of my belongings. I wonder if I can have them back now that Rhovan can tell my true intentions,my true thoughts and feelings, my every emotion open for him to see.

He's laying next to me, but he's not asleep. He's awake, thinking of the ways he should go about this new bond between us.

We know nothing of each other.

I only know his name and the fact that he is a halfling.

Half elf,

half human.

His thoughts are spinning around and around, wondering and wondering if he should ask me all the questions in his mind or not, all the things he's picked from my brain are twisted up, making no real sense to him.

I'm not sure I should trust him. I know he could be lethal if he wanted to, no matter how nice in bed he can be, no matter how nice his collar bones are, no matter how lovely his hair is...

"Are ya a spy?" His voice has an accent, a beautiful accent that has no resemblance to the way these people speak, which makes me wonder where it is he spends his time.

"Can you not search around my mind for that answer?" My voice is incredulous, but I try to reign in my haughty behavior, failingly so.

He sighs, runs his hand through his hair impatiently. "I do not trust what I see and feel from your mind. I will only trust you if your words match up. I can't tell what is real with ya. Your thoughts are twisted around like a vine in there."

It makes sense, but it also makes me feel empty inside that my tether-bound mate cannot trust me though I cannot blame him for that as I do not trust him fully either.

I don't answer. I don't want to give away too much. I don't want him to unwind my thoughts. I'm not sure what he would think of them, what he would think of me for abandoning my duty or if he would believe me even if I told him.

I unconsciously move in closer to him as I feel his anxiety running high with the growing need to understand me, or maybe it is my own anxiety transferred onto him. I can barely tell what is my own feelings anymore.

He wraps his strong arms around my waist, rubbing my back as he pulls me to lay on his chest, running his hands into my hair, pulling my head back to look me in the eyes.

"What's your agenda here, Gilryn? Why were you in those woods? Why do I see that bastard of a prince racing through your thoughts? To me, that seems like you're a traitor around here, not to be trusted. So tell me mate, how does this all add up for ya?"

The sweet gentleness, the beautiful roughness from the night before is gone now as his hand pulls roughly at my hair, straining my scalp. Our bond feels strained as well. It is hungry for us to feel content but we are only giving in to our need to mistrust.

We are back to the strangers of the days before, back to the people that have no idea how to go about this and though now is not the time, I can feel myself growing wet at the way he is handling me, my baser instincts loving the domination my male is exerting over me. I can feel my ears heating, my cheeks heating at this embarrassment as his eyes glance over my face, reading my emotions.

His gaze doesn't soften as he stares me down, awaiting my answer patiently, but I don't want to talk. I don't want to even think of Cyron, of my family, of anything. I just want to feel the way he makes me feel, explore the ways he can bring me pleasure, the ways he can bring me to life so easily with his touch, his tongue, his manhood that I can feel growing underneath my soft belly.

He flips us now, getting in my face, straddling my body with his. "Now is not the time for this, Imp."

But I just want this distraction, I need this distraction. "I think now is the perfect time for this." I try to flutter my lashes. I try to lull him into this with my womanly charms, the ones I've cultivated over the years along side Lorys.

He bangs a fist, frustrated with me, but I can feel how much he wants to just loose himself in me too. He closes his eyes tightly as my fingers run a path over his back, down his sides.

Eyes open as I close in on is manhood, tracing down his muscled stomach.

And then his eyes are flashing at me in anger, the pleasure he feels in my actions, in my looks, is waning quickly as the rage starts to burn inside him, scorching his insides, pressing in on my soul and turning me to a quivering mass as he lets out a deep growl in my ear, shaking me up.

"Stop it ya wild, Imp! Ya don' want to talk? That's fine, but don' go distractin' me with your lust! Don' go throwin' me out as if I am an ignorant male that only cares to bed his woman and nothin' more! Can I even call ya my woman? Can I? I grow more and more eerie by these actions ya are displayin' for me than anythin' else." He pushes away from me with a sigh of displeasure as I sit there stunned.

I realize my mistake, but I'm not ready to open up to him yet. I'm not ready to share all my secrets, all my thoughts, but do I have a choice? If I refuse, he might lock me up again. He's done his duty by binding himself fully to me, but that doesn't mean he has to trust me. That doesn't mean anything if I can't pour out my painful truths to the man that is my other half.

I turn my head as he quickly dresses.

"I'll give ya some time to think, but I expect the truth by nightfall and don't even think about leavin' this room. If ya do, I can't guarantee your safety. Your not much liked around here." He gives me a sarcastic grin, a twisted smile that speaks volumes to the distaste he has in the way I tried to trick him, in the way I tried to distract him when he was only trying to understand me, to know what my real purposes are and not the disorganized thoughts that could lead to some very dangerous conclusions.

I feel ashamed of myself as he stomps from the room. Leaving me in this room that he so thoughtfully set up for us.

But how can he expect me to reveal my troubles to him? How can he expect so much of a practical stranger? I barely know his people. I don't understand what their hopes are, their dreams, what they fight for. They could be murderers. In my eyes they seem like the traitors. They seem like the people with ill intent.

I flop to my back and clutch my ears, clutch my head. My braids are a mess, pulled and jumbled, my metal rings hardly in place. They are a wonderful representation of what I feel like on the inside.

I wonder what I should tell him. I wonder what I should reveal to him and what I should ask for in return.

But there are a few questions in my mind that keep spinning and circling around and around, making me feel crazy, making me feel psychotic at all the possibilities and outcomes they could have for me.

Could my truths be a danger to me? Could my truths bring about even more hate and mistrust against me and my kind? Could they start a war?

Or is the war already here?