shy || jungkook x reader ✓

Fourteen

Jungkook pushed you away from him, removing your lips from his. You frowned, confused.

Jungkook couldn't do it. His eyes watered as memories replayed in his mind. Those horrible memories..

He thought he could do it. He thought he was ready. He wanted to, god knows he did. But he couldn't, not even for you.

That's when it clicked. He had to do it for himself, not for you. You stood there confused watching him grab and pull his hair frustrated.

"Jungkook?" You spoke up.

Her hands.

"Are you okay?"

They've been places they shouldn't be.

"Jungkook?"

Her touch.

"Jungkook?"

It disgusted him.

"Jungkook, are you okay?"

He didn't believe him.

"Jung-"

"SHUT UP!" He shouted and left the room running.

You followed him downstairs and out of the house. He was crying, you saw it. Million questions roamed through your mind.

You caught up to him and pull his shoulder to turn him around. Tears fell down his cheeks, making your heart ache once again.

Jungkook started to have difficulty with his breathing. Every breath he took became more shorter and vacant. It was another anxiety attack. He had been having them since that happened. But this was more bigger.

You saw him fall to the floor grabbing his chest.

"Hey, hey, Jungkook, look at me," you grabbed his chin and turned him to look at you. "you're going to be okay. Everything's okay. It's fine. I'm here. I won't leave."

It's always shitty to hear that. You've heard it before and it doesn't make it better.

"You know what? Fuck that. Nothing's okay." You spat. He again started struggling to breathe, "Nothing is fine. Maybe not in your world, but I'll be here for you. Whenever you need me, don't even doubt calling me. Wherever you are, I'll go. Whatever you need, I'll do. I can promise you I'll be here for you, through good and bad times. But I can also promise you that everything will be fine. Maybe not now, not tomorrow, but it will someday. And I'll be with you then." He calmed down a little bit. He laid his head on your lap looking up to you while you brushed your hand through his hair.

You thought you shouldn't say it like this, but it seemed like he needed for you to say it. You needed to say it.

You've been hurt in the past and the fear of being hurt again is still there. You fear that love is really a lie. You fear that you might die without being able to experience true love.

But then you thought,

"I'm a bad bitch, you can't kill me."

"And I'll be there, because I love you. And because I love you, I won't leave you when you need me. Even if you don't feel the same, I'll be there."

"Always."

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Updated A/N: i had written a rant about being insecure of my writing here, if I'm being honest, i still am. Please respect your authors, don't be rude, we have feelings too.