It's Valentine's Day, Spider-Hubby! [Spideypool]

✿ 𝓌𝑒𝒹𝓃𝑒𝓈𝒹𝒶𝓎 ✿

They're doing daytime patrols when the Doom Bots start attacking the city so of course they're the first ones on the scene. By the time the small group of Avengers show up, Deadpool has lost a leg and a hand and he's slowly in the process of growing them back, but half of the bots are down.

"Spidey, look at me. I'm only half the man I used to be," Wade sings to him.

"Red, I swear to-" he stops at the sound of Iron Man's thrusters blowing a Doom Bot out of the sky.

"Look, Webs, the calvary is here!"

"We're practically all cleaned up now," he says petulantly in response, ripping the head off of a bot before using the body to knock three more out of commission. The closer the Avengers get he can hear his suit coms start to kick in until their all connected. Wade doesn't seem to notice however.

"I still think you're a dirty boy," he says in his raspy voice and Peter squeaks before lobbing a Doom head at him full force. He can hear someone holding back a laugh through their comms even as Wade starts complaining. "Holy fuck, Spidey, I think you bruised my kidneys.

"Team Comms, DP!"

"It's only Iron Dildo, Captain Ameri-hottie and his little Wingman."

"Always a pleasure, Deadpool," Cap says as polite as possible but he's blushing when Spiderman looks over at him.

"You bet it is."

"Stop flirting with Cap," Peter finds himself saying through an amused sigh.

"Sir, yes, sir!" Deadpool says happily, saluting with his nub. The bleeding has stopped, but his limbs are still barely recognizable. It's this second fact that has Peter scared when he's too far to get to the flashing Doom Bot that's headed for his husband.

"Red, please tell me you can get out of the way of that thing"

"Not fast enough," Wade says and he sounds both apologetic and resigned to his fate. Peter goes to swing over, but the bot is there before him. It explodes in a rain of metal shrapnel, one piece just large enough to pierce Deadpool's chest.

"For fucks sake!" Peter groans as the rest of the team finishes off the evil robots. He lands next to Wade and pulls the metal from his chest then sets about sitting him up and making him more comfortable so when he wakes up spouting blood from his lips he won't just choke.

Iron Man is next to him once the last Doom Bot is destroyed. His face plate is dissolving in seconds and he's talking with a similarly restrained but resigned voice.

"C'mon, kid, he can come to the tower. We can give him something more comfortable to wear while he heals."

Peter nods, but when Cap goes to help lift the body he simply throws Wade over his shoulder like he weighs nothing and shoots a web to the Avengers base. They arrive a short time later after Peter's already put Wade to bed in one of the extra rooms in a pair of sweatpants and a long sleeve shirt.

Peter is in the kitchenette playing music and making tacos for whenever his husband wakes up when they enter the lounge. He's wearing sweatpants over his own suit, mask pulled up to the bridge of his nose so he can take a few bites of his lunch. His gloves are left abandoned on the coffee table.

"Where's Deadpool?" Tony asks immediately and it's the first time Peter has heard him sound almost genuinely concerned for the actively immortal SHIELD recruit.

"He's fine. Healing in a guest room." He motions to the counters around him full of enough taco material to feed a small army. He and Wade's metabolism is enough to eat a restaurant owner out of house and home, add a few super soldiers to that and he doesn't know what could happen. "I made him tacos."

Tony notices the glistening before anyone else. Peter decides later that it's probably because he's a nosey no-good know-it-all.

"Hey, is that a ring, Underoos?" he asks teasingly, coming over to start making his own taco. "I thought you said you weren't married."

"No," counters Peter, "I said I didn't have a wife."

Peter can see the gears turning in the older man's head ready to prove him wrong before he finally admits defeat.

"Touché."

Peter grins at him as Sam and Cap finally make their way into the kitchen to start eating.

It doesn't take much longer for Wade to wake up, but when he does he begs for Peter to fix him two tacos with everything while he tries to find the bathroom. Peter agrees and thankfully FRIDAY is there to direct him to the facilities. When he comes back, he sits down next to Peter with wet hands.

"I washed them this time, promise!" Wade says making grabby hands for his plate. Peter slides it over and watches as Wade lifts his mask, takes one bite and tries to cover his mouth in front of the other three heroes, but he only succeds in spreading the mess of grease and meat that was dripping down his scarred chin everywhere else.

Moving his hand out the way, Peter grabs a napkin and wipes away the mess.

"You're disgusting, Red," Peter says, but it's dopey and fond and Wade grins at him, mouth still full of food.

"Thanks, Spidey, you really know how to treat a girl," says Wade happily before leaning over and placing a loud smacking wet kiss on his cheek.

Peter's blushing and has to pull his mask back down to hide it, but Wade is still smiling happily.

"I made Spider-Man blush!" Wade is cackling to no one in particular, but Sam and Cap both find it equally funny. Later when Clint comes in through the vents, following the smell of mexican food, he thinks so too.

None of them are paying much attention to Tony who is looking between Spider-Man and Deadpool in a bit of happy awe, because he has finally put it together and is berating himself over it. How could he not have seen it sooner? He'd think he was an idiot if he wasn't such a genius.