Erika- A War torn Love

Chapter 8

Over a year had passed since Leisels rape and my subsequent encounter with the Mongols responsible.

The war had continued around us, with air raid sirens now being a regular occurrence, however I had witnessed no further events like those I had encountered prior to Leisels rape. The town was now devoid of Jewish families, with numerous houses within the town laying empty, gradually falling into disrepair.

Fritz had been sent to fight on the front line about six months ago, the last we heard he was heading towards the Russian front. My father continually worried, as each day passed with no word from him. Of course we would eventually receive word confirming he was ok and what progress the army was making.

I never asked any questions, or tried to find out anything more than my father told me about my brother.

After our argument the day of Leisels rape I struggled to communicate, or even be around Fritz. Before he left we would pass in the hallway with a flash of a smile or a semi pleasant muttering before one of us would excuse ourselves, usually as fast as possible. It wasn't really him being a Nazi that made me unable to speak with him, although I still did not like it, I blamed him for my friends rape. Our argument that morning drove us into the woods, he drove me to kill two soldiers. He made me loose the little childhood innocence I had, that the war had not already taken. I also blamed him for Leisels rape, it was something I would never forgive him for.

It was 1st  June 1941, thirteen days before my birthday and the day that Leisel was leaving. Leisel and I had been planning a small event to celebrate, in my Garden, with music and cakes, just us, her parents and my father. Proper parties and dances had ceased with the beginning of the war, but she thought that turning sixteen should not be unmarked. The threat of bombs made it too dangerous to be in buildings without air raid shelters, therefore the Garden of our house was a suitable alternative with our well stocked air raid shelter accessible from both the house and the garden.

Unfortunately that would not be as by then Leisel would be gone. The weather was a nice early summers day. The sun was shining brightly, and I remember looking at the sky and was unable to see  any clouds. It was a usual Saturday when Leisel came to say goodbye. I was  tending to the Garden, spraying our vines with what little insecticide we had left. Since the war started getting hold of all products for tending the land became difficult. My father had stocked up as much as he could, but we increasingly had to ration our usage and as such the quality of our produce was getting poorer.

Leisel entered the Garden through the house. I immediately knew something was wrong. She would have known I would be in the Garden so would normally have entered through the side door. Before I could even greet her she began. She had entered through the house because her mother and father were in the front room with my father.

She had convinced them to come so that she could see me and explain.

I began to panic, knowing that I was not going to like what was to come.  As she continued to speak, her voice choked up. Her piercing blue eyes filled with tears.

She cleared her throat and with tears now streaming down her face she explained that her family were leaving Helmstedt. 

Her father had been tipped off that a group of SS soldiers were moving from the south of Germany to move out the last of the Jews. They worried this may include those families such as Leisels that were part Jewish. With Fritz being in the SS and knowing her mother was Jewish they couldnt risk staying.  They were going to try to get to Holland, where they had some family. Their family promised that if they could get there they would be safe.

"It had to be safer than staying" she said finishing her explanation.

I wanted to cry as Leisel spoke, but instead bit the inside of my lip. Leisel didnt want to leave anymore than I didnt want her to, but she had to, to be safe I understood that. We had both seen firsthand what the Nazis could do to the Jews, and if the SS were coming they could not take any chances, they had to go.

As Leisel stopped speaking I knew I had to go over to my friend and give her my blessing. I began to walk over to her just as the dammed air raid siren began. I looked up to the sky, it was so clear, you would see planes coming from miles away, and so I knew there could be no mistake, we were about to be bombed.

I took hold of Leisels hand and ran for the house. As we moved towards the house my father and Leisels parents appeared in the doorway.

"Hurry girls, hurry" my father was shouting.

He was becoming more frantic in his movement, he too didnt think this was a false alarm. As we made it to the doorway there was no noise. I looked up to the sky, wondering if there really were planes approaching. I waited stood in the doorway, to see the planes come over. My father had lead Leisel and her family to our cellar and was shouting from below my name.

"Erika, Erika where are you".

The noise of the planes made it almost impossible to hear his voice. This was the first time I had clearly seen them since being scarred at the beginning of the war.

I stood fixed on the sight of the planes. In that moment I had completely forgot I was supposed to be getting to safety. They were too high in the sky to see clearly but still I studied the bombers, dark green in colour with markings at the tail.  I knew the destruction the bombers caused, but the way they travelled through the sky, with such ease was breathtaking.

Then I heard it, a whistle, which was getting louder. I looked round scanning the sky but could see nothing, the planes had disappeared over the house.

In the distance I could hear the sound of explosions, but still the whistling got louder.  Then I felt a tug at my arm.

"Erika, we have to go, what are you doing, ERIKA"

I then felt a sharp pain across my face. I touched my face, and then realised Leisel was stood next to me, shaking my arm. She was shouting at me as my fixation on the sky broke. I realised she was dragging me through the rear lobby towards the cellar. This part of our house was separated from the main property and so made the cellar accessible from the garden and the house.

All around me hung to air were dried meats and vegetables. This was how we managed to eat well all year round. Recently however my father had began moving many of our dried goods down to the cellar, along with water and emergency equipment. He thought they were safer there. Actually he had moved them in case of us being bombed in, but tried playing down his worries.

By now Leisel had me at the top of the cellar steps. She was about to hit me again when I stopped her with my free hand.

"I am alright, you go first, I'll follow" I told her.

She looked at me, nodded her head then began down the stairs. I saw her face looking back at me as I moved my feet onto the first step. At that moment the world around me blew up. My body was thrown from the top of the steps, launched down into the cellar. I was thrown into Leisel who by now had reached the bottom of the stairs. I screamed as I hit her, but the sound of the bomb was so deadening my scream went unheard. A ploom of fire and smoke followed as my father dragged us away from the position we fell.

My ears were ringing, so hard I couldnt hear a thing. The faces of Leisel and her parents told me they were screaming uncontrollably. As I lay on the floor I felt as if I was on a boat, with the room spinning around, and noise seeming to come from everywhere. I could see my father stood above me, his lips moving as though he was speaking to me. As hard as I tried I was unable to catch what he was saying. I put my hands to my ears, rubbing them as if to clear a blockage.

Leisel was now trying to pull my hands down, also moving her mouth as though talking to me. All I heard was the constant ringing in my ears. As I tried to sit, my body seemed to move all over the place. My father and Leisels strong grip ceased my arms, pushing me back to the floor.

I struggled with them, trying to free myself I eventually realising that the movement of his lips seemed to say "stay still you need to stay still I need to see how badly you are hurt".

With that the cellar went black, I had passed out.