Chapter 21- where does light go

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Axel couldn't believe how quickly the light disappeared when the door was slammed shut. There was nothing in the darkroom except for the sound of his own heartbeat and a murmur in his head that reminded him of Seven's presence. It was maddening. All sick and solemn, Axel felt a sickness grow in his stomach like an infestation. He'd been through an entire spectrum of the emotions since he woke up. Isolation. Confusion. Fear. Anger. Desperation. Melancholy. Guilt. Fury. It was becoming too much to handle.

A chair had been placed underneath the door handle so even if he wanted to, he couldn't escape. It was a dark, unforgiving place but he brought this on himself. He was more of a danger to them than Seven was.

Imprisonment left Axel with himself. Alone with his thoughts. Hardly moving, the boy laid in a crumpled heap too overwhelmed to move. Moreover, the guilt from what he had done to Axel chewed his insides like a starving rat scavenging for food that was Willing to eat anything.

Pressing his fingers against his forehead, he sighed. He didn't realise that this is what it would feel like to be a prisoner. That it would be this tedious. He thought that Thorne wasn't going to go to this extent and he was stupid to think that. What would the others think of him? What would Thorne tell them? This was a prison. Prison left you to yourself. Prison let you break yourself. Soon, with the seed of insanity growing in his mind that was catalyzed by his loneliest thoughts, there would be nothing left of him. Just a hollow shell filled with a monstrous being and not an ounce of humanity. That, that scared him to the core. It haunted every quiet moment. There was only one way that would stop this train of losing himself. He had nothing to lose. The urge to end things only grew stronger...

Shaking his head violently, Axel tried to dislodge the sinister thoughts that were eventually going to push him over the edge. Although he was only one step away from falling into the abyss that was his consciousness, Axel kept the thoughts close. They made him powerful. Being a doppelganger was his greatest enemy and friend.

Thoughts were his tormentors. Seven was his tormentors. This was slow torture only escapable by sleep. Even when he did sleep, Axel would dream about things he could never remember when he woke up. During the day, there was merely an itch in the back of his mind. However, the second he woke up the feelings that came along with the dreams sharpened which only intensified his need to remember. They felt too important to be ignored. Every emotion just felt so strong and unyielding.

Bullies get bored when they are ignored, Axel realised. If he pushed away from the dark thoughts and left Seven's call floating aimlessly in his mind, time would cease them. Swallowing, Axel slid down the wall and sat down with his knees digging into his chest. Filled with resentment, he thrashed his arms in the water. For a second, the whites of his eyes blackened.

"It's not my fault," growled Axel, careful not to be heard and assumed mad. "It's not my fault I can't feel how cold it is anymore. What if I'm like Sage? He stopped shivering and no one locked him up. Maybe this is just another symptom that comes from dying of the cold. Or from being a doppelganger."

Doppelganger. Pausing, Axel felt his mind grow empty. Doppelganger as in a supernatural creature which is an omen for bad luck and death.

"Lucky me," Axel muttered, pressing his teeth together but he couldn't help feeling curious.

Did the power Seven talked about include magic? It wouldn't be a farfetched idea since Seven mentioned that Facesmiths used magic to translate languages so they could communicate with each other. Thorne was right- Seven was there for a reason. Thorne had also seen him physically change and mentioned something about remembering his past memories but refused to explain any further. And Axel didn't push any further.

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