Chapter-34 She's back

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~Hate is baggage, life's too short to be pissed off all the time it's just not worth it.~

Lily's pov

My hands shook side by side as I felt adrenaline rushing through my veins. My fingers threaded towards the pocket of my blazer pulling out a cigarette before lighting it up with a lighter. Clouds drifted away from a full room, drenching the patio with soft lunar light, the night was dark, cigarette-filled, and quiet.

A cold shiver crept through my spine as I felt the wind blew by my face. Inhaling the toxic fumes I grimaced at the bitter feeling swirling inside my chest, I felt disconnected from the world my emotions numb, and yet my heart was racing and my knees felt like Jell-O.

"Drop that cigarette."

I gave out a startled gasp my hands flying towards my heart and that made it drop instantly. Shaking my head in annoyance I crushed the cigarette under my feet meeting his blue irises, I stared at the intensity of his eyes the way they pulled me deep within almost as if like a dark blue ocean. Not wanting to waste my time, I said nothing yet hastily rushed past him hoping he would just ignore the mere existence of mine but I don't get the chance.

He grabbed me by the arm and spun me to him with one purposeful move. I'm slammed against his chest with my palms that land flush against his, I gawk in surprise when I felt his hard muscles underneath my fingertips. He holds my gaze steadily and my heart quickens. Then ever so slowly, he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear with his long callous fingers and I leaned against his chest for a moment comforted by the warmth of his muscular chest that was like a magnet.

He sighed deeply, his whole chest heaving pulling me impossibly closer to him by pressing one hand behind my hair gently guiding me forward. His musky, manly scent overpowers my nostrils as I drown myself in it.

"Oh baby, what have you done to yourself?" My shoulders sagged in response but yet I stayed silent curling my hand in a fist and studied his face.

"Why-" I took a sharp intake of breath before continuing. "Does it matter?" I found myself questioning him.

Adam grasped my chin in his rough hold with an unknown glint evident in his eyes. "I don't want to see you like this ever, lily just give me a chance to prove myself to you." Despite the roughness of his tone, his voice was gentle and soft.

"We can fix this, fix us." His words struck me hard refreshing the wounds and I absolutely hated it. My heart bled with agonizing pain, I didn't think I was capable of feeling this emotion after keeping them closed for so long. Biting the inside of my cheek I pushed him away creating a good distance between us.

What happened to hating him lily, don't forget he's the one who broke you.

I clad my expression in blankness before daring up to meet his gaze. "Us? you are nothing but a crazy part of my illusion, a fairytale I believed in which I no longer do."

Did he think it was that easy to just get over everything, and each ounce of pain he had caused me?

"You see Adamos, through all those years I waited- hell I burned for you, I burned just to be close to you." I snapped before barking out a humourless laughter. "That was how naive I was," I admitted pushing back the heavy feeling inside my chest.

"Just because I let you pleasure me, doesn't mean that I'm accepting you back into my life- it meant nothing!"

His eyebrows ceased in anger and it was obvious he was holding himself back from lashing out on me. "Are you seeing someone else?" He spitted the word 'someone else' with such distaste. I held back a scoff. "Frankly, that is none of your business but I can and I will give my heart to someone who is more deserving."

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