WERE TOO YOUNG <3

"Chapitre 11": Refuse to fit in

It was definitely a crazy night like the Cinderella story , coming back from the party with full energy on my brother's motorcycle in the calm street of the big city .  And keep walking home with heels in my hands singing and dancing like a crazy AMANTE
Will everyone is sleeping

...
"School was for studying not for fooling around "
I decided to live by that rule from that Saturday night on , I put my headphones and listened to old school merengue and bachata as I worked . It kept me calm for the day .
Lesi was on the phone when I got down but he quickly shut his phone off when he saw me. I smiled at him and blushed when I realised that he was weirdly looking at me . I averted my gaze and let him continue . It was him ..
I tried not to stare but failed miserably. We stood in the middle of cardio room awkwardly , waiting for someone to break the silence. The coach was watching us curiously as if waiting for one of us to throw a tantrum . I bet he was surprised .
I kept redoing how the moment would have gone in my head a gazillion times. He spoked with "worried voice sparkled with some awkwardness " : he called me , saying that you were dancing with iron in a short dress the whole night ! .
I replied with "confidence " : yes I did with no regrets and it was the best night .
He gives me a large smile : that's what matter
I couldn't understand why a boy that no long in my life still spying on me like a criminal . But actually the answer was in the top of my head .
It was my fault , honestly .....

FLASH BACK to 4 years ...
When I had a beautiful life , laughing , dancing with my best friend "rest in peace my love 🕊".
I wasn't thinking of anything as we were the famous friends in our school . Everyone used to call us with special nicknames : Luna & Maxi . Mine was maxi named by one of the boys I used to always fight with . We enjoyed our life as if it was our last year . We feel it in our vines , playing guitar making music , dancing in the road with ice cream in our hands . Making memories .. until the day she heard me talking about him not in a hurtful way after he tried to sexualise one of my classmates in a physical way I leaned my hand to the top of his back with a large slap . The slap was a pretty big deal , she was running so fast towards him in some of the cloudy days in September , I walked up to her trying to stop her from running with a worried smile , I could go ahead because you had to go to the bathroom . I though nothing of it.
I went to my place . Put my stuff away, and went on my merry way to her , and I saw her , running .. she turned back and smiled at me with her eyes sparkling , her brown eyes always could see right throughout everything. She crossed the road in a bad way that no one could help her but him !
A black motorcycle was crushing peaces of the small angel .What he did ? He was there smiling cause the girl that would have exposed him is gone was hit .
I looked up to from the other sidewalk with my full drowned eyes , my heart skipping a beat , raising my eyebrows ..... until i feel it bergen next to me tapping on my shoulders . His grey eyes sparkled slightly and his eyebrows shot up the slightest bit that if I wasn't concentrating so hard on his facial expression I would have missed that small movement. I couldn't tell what will happen next .
For almost 3 years I couldn't even forgive him and till this day I will not . Going through depression and stopping from being me "Maxi" was all cause of his expression and happiness when he wasn't exposed by her .
I couldn't help myself more just by helping her boyfriend lesi that become my friend later ..
I helped myself with no one's help through the darkness and I made it successfully .
His end was very close At my hands
For the way he hated eye contact , I looked at him with her blood splashing on the road .
He was taking all the concept as a joke with my old friend that I no long considered him as a friend and I was taking it as a revenge with no feelings cold like the ice berg . I through that revenge was the good idea to take back what he tooked . Things were different when we're young when the story first began, manipulating , toxicity. I knew myself before I knew anyone , I could never love someone like him to even caring about someone like him . And every time the sun came in he was trying to manipulate me in a way I could melt with those lies . I didn't run I started young , out of touch from her soul , I didn't listened to no one's advices as I did to my head and my broken heart " revenge please" .
I left myself to my peaces and my throughs . Things were getting deeper when he start acting like a lover with a caring shoes , begging for attention and love .
I turned my back to see my last real friend bergen going to Valencia to finish his studies , he hugged me and said slowly: don't try to take revenge, god will do his job (love you) . I couldn't sleep that night with the fire inside me eating every mercy peace , every night staying up asking why ?
I've never being afraid from no one but god maybe this why I was brave as hell to do anything , when I wake up I wasn't afraid somebody else may take my place , and sell his soul .
All of my organs were screaming "punch him , punch him" , I stepped to my favourite class Mrs leather jacket class , Him with a nice words coming from his mouth saying : can you be mine ! I didn't heard a word or understand it .
"he was the reason my bestie died and he's now asking me to be his girlfriend ?" Like a psycho thinker, something was wrong I know it but he didn't understand my answer I said "okey" with no interest .
He played a nasty game
He act for whole years that he's in something with me and I was thinking is it worthy to get revenge . Actually I was thinking that revenge is everything I stepped to his game with my feet knowing damn well he's a devil , I through its the only way I can get revenge is by playing back his game and playing if well . It feels a little bit empty stuck under feeling dirty , he put a spell on me not like a witch but more like lucifer , until I woke up that day with a whole different vibe like I'm losing my mind graving freedom and forgetting about revenge , otherwise having a new perspective about it . I was in my room crying till my breath start getting stuck , my ma comes in with her worried look asking if it's him the reason of the tear's ocean ! I said backwards I feel trapped with a spell .....
well guess what I was right , it's a spell , 2 spells , one made by his manipulation and the other was made by his illogical mother . I've been losing my mind trapped by lucifer and lilith the whole time .
It was summer as I always spend it in our farm with the horses and the animals , nature was my skipping place with the fresh air my ma was my second mother although she's my aunt she said to me after I that terrible crying "revenge is not a deal when you're pain is unhealed " I was controlled by enchantement not knowing what's my next move .