Rekindled

5 - The Letter

RECAP:

I took the bag of Lily's belongings, "They found these on her. I think you guys would want them..." There was a small box in the bag. I opened it and took out the first object. It was her necklace with photos of each family member in the locket which opened like a flower. I gave it to Emily. I then took out a small handmade keychain. Her and Rumi made matching ones as kids. I gave it to Harumi. While Em and Rumi comforted each other, Nya stood up and placed her hand on my shoulder while I held the last item in the box - her Yang half.

COLE'S POV

After spending the whole day at the monastery, I took Caleb home and put him to sleep. I locked the window and kissed Caleb's forehead. I put the duvet over his shoulders and made sure he's comfortable. "Goodnight, buddy!"

"Goodnight!" He let out a small giggle before snuggling in the blanket and going to sleep. I left the door slightly open as I went to the bedroom. I noticed a piece of paper sticking out from the bag of Lily's belongings. It must've been the note she was writing on the ambulance. I unfolded the slightly crumpled piece of paper and read it silently to myself.

Dear Cole, I don't have much time. I know that there is a very small chance that I'll make it so I'm writing this so that I can say goodbye. I know that you're scared. I am too. Don't worry, you probably won't see me again but if there is an afterlife, I will watch from there. I will guide you in any way I can. It will be a difficult time but please, no matter what happens, protect Caleb. Don't forget about him because of me. Don't occupy your mind with me, I won't be there physically anymore, don't waste your time. Focus on raising Caleb. I know it's scary, being a single father. I'm sorry that I can't be with you while he grows up. Promise me that you'll support him in life, okay? I love you, Cole. Tell Caleb I love him too. 

I read the words again and again. 

I didn't come home in time.

I kept repeating the words in my head 'I know it's scary, being a single father, I know it's scary, being a single father, I know it's scary, being a single father' until tears started streaming down my face and onto the words 'I know it's scary, being a single father' I was torturing myself, my mind occupied with those eight words. I sank into the floor next to the bed, letter clutched to my chest like it's a pillow, or a teddy bear. I was sobbing silently to myself. Eventually, I had my knees tucked in, my head down but the tears wouldn't stop flowing. 

"I promise..."

I woke up, still in the sitting position, letter still in hand. I stood up, put the letter away and went to the bathroom to sort myself out. My hair was a complete mess and I had huge bags under my eyes. I splashed cold water onto my face, clearing my head a bit. I combed my hair so that it wouldn't be so tangled. I got changed straight into my work clothes and came downstairs to make breakfast. 

I hesitated before walking into the kitchen.

"Lily! Who did this to you?"

"Emergency phone, Cole!"

"Keep pressure on the wound, I'll call someone."

I walked into the kitchen and made myself and Caleb a sandwich for breakfast. He came downstairs shortly after and let out an overexaggerated yawn.

"Morning, buddy! How did you sleep?"

"Good..." He looked around, "Where's mummy?"

I gave him his food in the dining room before giving a reply, "She's not here..."

"Why? Where did she go?" he asked curiously.

"I need to talk to you..." I went to the kitchen and took out a box of matches before coming back to Caleb. I took out a match and showed it to him. "You see this?"