And Then There Was Victor

Chapter 6

Summer Before College, 1998

I did not realize I was being left behind until the moment when the actual leaving happened. Yara, who was desperate to escape, was accepted into Tampa and with that came helping her pack all her things into her car. I felt a sudden sense of loss, so many laughs and adventures happened in that gold Volvo. Yara was not sorry to leave us, her smile was brilliant and cheery, no regrets. She wouldn't look back and moan, wonder what she'd left behind. Not Yara, she was ready to take in deep gulps of air in a new town and conquer it with her winning smile. We had squealed in excitement when we discovered Yara's university was next to a Coast Guard base. 'MILITARY GUYS!' we had said excitedly and danced around, making Yara to promise to provide all details. Her dad bought her a cellphone and she looked so grown as she placed it in her purse that I felt a pang of jealousy. I was stuck here at home, sure I was going to be going to college, but to look at Yara made me realize she was moving at a different speed than I was.

"I'll miss you and I love you." Yara clutched me. I nodded and promised to provide her details if she did the same.

Our final hug was tight, we clasped to one another, promising to call, and to see each other in Thanksgiving. With that, we waved goodbye watching our beloved Volve drive off and turn at the end of the road.

And then there were three.

Rosalind cried a little but was comforted by the thought that both she and Mercy were both going to Georgia and at least they'd have each other. The next week I watched Rosalind and Mercy also leave me and that's when I cried.

"I'm going to be all alone!"

"You're going to know half the people in the campus," Mercy said.

But it was not the same, I would be the last of the Patty Girls, the Patty Girls were done and what had defined me for the past three years had just evaporated. Like my house in Miami. They were leaving and I saw blue walls where my own walls should have been. Dancing gods, I remembered.

"Mom hates that I'm going to Georgia," Rosalind said. "She wants me in Miami, my grandparents are there and my sister."

"Your Mom can't control all of your life," Mercy's practical tone was evergreen.

"I might join a sorority," Rosalind said.

Mercy scoffed and met my eyes. "You're going to be fine, Becka. Maybe you'll be friends with Victor!"

I scoffed angrily. "I refuse to."

"I wonder why he didn't take the scholarship to Virginia," Mercy said.

"Clem's in Virginia," I said.

He was probably going to have the time of his life in Virginia. Maybe one day I'd see him playing for a big team like the Red Socks and I'd tell my future husband that I'd once danced with Clemente Cruz. Overall as the days passed I thought less and less about Clem, as if the wound was slowly cauterizing.

I helped Mercy and Rosalind load their things in their cars, Rosalind's dad was driving with them. That day, as I watched their cars turn at the end of the road, I tasted loneliness for the first time in a long time.

Which is how I ended up in the salon demanding my hair be highlighted within an inch of its life. I wanted to look different, grown-up, sexy. I wanted to have adventures with college guys, and hopefully lose my virginity as it seemed to be an important step. I knew Mercy was no longer a virgin but Yara was cagey about it and Rosalind and I were confessed inexperienced. The highlights looked amazing, they framed my face and the stylist had added bangs which for the first time in my life, I liked. As I walked out of the salon that day, my new hair bouncing around me, a grown man stopped and stared at me.