Southern Boy Charm | ✓

Chapter 19

"Your mom was telling me about all the cool stuff here." Jack says as I make my way down the stairs and back to the table. I sit down in almost a trance, not really comprehending what just happened.

That's it. Nick and I are over.

After this entire summer, after how far we've come, it seems so sudden. All our moments are rushing back to me. This can't be the end of everything. It just doesn't feel right.

"Leighton?"

I jolt, completely forgetting that Jack is talking to me. He shoots me a quizzical look before continuing. "I said that maybe after dinner you can show me around."

I shoot him a forced smile. "Yeah. Of course." I try to muster as much enthusiasm as I can, and while it works on Jack, it doesn't seem to convince my mom.

"Maybe you can show him that treehouse that you love so much," she suggests, wiggling her eyebrows. "It's awfully romantic."

My eyes turn to my food, wanting this conversation about the treehouse to be over. But Jack seems as unaffected and charming as ever, shooting my mom a show-stopping smile. "We'll add it to the list."

I try to flash him a smile, anything really, as he looks up at me for confirmation, but I can't. I don't want to take Jack to the treehouse or the barn or anywhere at all. Despite what just happened between me and Nick, this is still our place. Our little summer getaway. To take Jack around would be to trample over our memories here. And with what just happened between the two of us, that may be all that we have left now.

Kelly sits back quietly, eating her porkchops. "Are you going to finish your food Leighton?" she asks, looking down at my still full plate. I know that it's code. She wants to ask how Nick and I's conversation went, and I wish that I had good news for her, but I don't.

"No. I'm not feeling too hungry."

She nods her head, and her sad expression gives me all the confirmation I need. She understands.

"I can take your plates from you guys if you want to head out," she says, and I gladly accept. The sooner that I can get away from my mom, the better. I know that she's trying to do a nice thing, so I can't be mad, but her stuffing Jack down my throat every five seconds isn't what I need or want at the moment.

Outside, the wind whips at my skin. It's colder than when Nick and I were out just an hour ago, and I can't help but feel that the weather and I have experienced the same shift in mood. He notices my shivering and shrugs off his jacket, placing it over my bare shoulders.

It's oversized and hangs over me like a large blanket, and it's such a cute sentiment that I can't help but flash him a genuine smile. He's so sweet and kind that the thought crosses my mind that maybe I don't deserve him. He deserves someone who will be one hundred percent invested in him, and only him.

But that was me only a month ago, right? And while my fight with Nick still feels raw, eventually, when I do get over him, I will be the girl that Jack deserves. All I need is a little time, and he's a nice enough guy to wait for me.

As I look up at him, taking in the farm with a look of awe, I can't help but think about how adorable he is, and how lucky any girl would be to have him.

"Here's the barn," I say, pointing him towards the peeling red structure. His nose scrunches up as he walks in, and I don't even realize how unaffected the smell is to me now.

"It has an interesting smell," he says, coughing from the thick scent. His eyes land on the animals and they light up. "But the animals sure are cute."

He reaches over to pet the pigs, and the obvious dirt on them doesn't seem to bother him much. He settles his attention on one with big black patches. "Especially this little guy."

I observe the scene, Jack hunched over the cute farm animals, and I know that I should be swooning. But it all just feels... wrong. He isn't supposed to be in here, and I'm not supposed to be in here with him. It's enough to leave my whole body feeling uneasy, but I push the feeling down and force myself to crack a smile.

It's just because the wound between me and Nick is still fresh, I tell myself. The moment that I get over it, everything will feel normal again.

But when I take him everywhere else, the field and the stables, the feeling doesn't subside. It's in the pit of my belly, gnawing at me, telling me that this isn't right and that I left the wrong person inside. When we stop at the stables, he turns to me.

"So is the last stop before the treehouse?"

My blood runs cold. I want to yell no. That the treehouse is mine and Nick's and that my mom had no business bringing it up. That he had no business being there. But there's a glimmer in his eye, a hope that I wouldn't dare to kill. Suddenly, I'm reminded of how much of an asshole I'm being. He's driven all this way for me, and all I'm doing is trashing him inside of my head. He doesn't deserve that.

So, I make a pledge to be nice to him from now on, to give him a fair shot against what Nick and I had. Because despite this summer, Jack and I have much more history that Nick and I ever had. Well, romantic history that is. As long as I allow myself to remember what me and Jack used to have, then I was going to be all right.

The entire trek through the woods, I focus on silencing my rising guilt. Jack seems in awe of how comfortable I am, weaving through trees without fear that I'll get lost. It's one of cool effects of him being here. He's a physical representation of what I was like before I came here, and how much I've changed. My newfound love for the outdoors is just one of the many changes, and it never seizes to amaze me how much one summer can change everything.

When we approach the treehouse, I cross the rope bridge quickly, with Jack following cautiously behind. Once inside, he's silent, and I stare at him, waiting for his reaction.

After taking in his surroundings he wraps his arm around my shoulder, pulling me towards him. "It's amazing in here Leighton."

He smells like Irish Spring soap, and subconsciously I press my nose into him. A feeling of betrayal rises when I realize what I'm doing, but I quickly push it down as he studies the bookcases.

"Geez, there's so many," he says, taking a random book off the shelf and thumbing through it. "Why would one person ever want to read so many books voluntarily?"

I want to say that each book, with its weathered pages and disintegrating spines are little treasures. That everyday since Nick introduced me to The Outsiders and Wuthering Heights I've come in here with him, laid in the hammock, and read in his arms. But instead, I just laugh.

He stares down at the book in his hands. It's The Outsiders. "I read this book for freshman year English class," he says, putting it back on the shelf. "It was an absolute snooze fest. You would have hated it."

His attention goes elsewhere towards the hammock. Before I can process, he lays down on it, rocking back and forth. I stare at him, longer than I intended to, not wanting to lay beside him. Every other betrayal I could ignore, but laying there, with him, would feel too wrong. I couldn't betray Nick like that.

But there Jack is, looking at me with soft, expectant brown eyes and a giant smile, patting the spot next to him. No one in my position would be able to turn him down.

Gingerly, I lay down beside him, and he wraps me in his comforting embrace. I wish that I could say that I hate it, that I want him to be as far away from me as possible, but I can't. Being in his arms feels... comforting. Safe. Suddenly, I'm starting to feel optimistic that I can move past Nick after all. When I lay my head on his chest, this hope inside me grows, spreading from my brain to my chest in a warm, fluttery path.

But then the door opens and my heart drops.

Because there, in the doorway with fisted hands, is Nick.