The Way This Feels

Chapter 15: Sand

BANG

I awake with a gasp and a jolt, shooting straight upright in bed.

"Sshhh sshhh"

I turn wildly in the dark, I've forgotten I'm not alone. "It's just me." His voice whispers, and my body begins to relax, a feeling of foolishness settles in its place. Just a dream, no real noises. When I finally find Micah's eyes in the dark, they look strangely clear, alert.

"How long have I been asleep?" I ask, my voice garbled, sleep still hanging on despite the dream.

"2 hours." Micah answers, his voice impassive. I blink several times trying to shake the exhaustion. There's something not clicking.

Oddly, I feel his hand gently brush my wrist, and I look down trying to find it in the darkness, like I might grab it. But confusion makes my hand fall back into my lap. I search for his eyes. 

"Go back to sleep." He whispers, and I begin to move obligingly back to my pillow but he stays sitting up. That's when I realize he's half off the bed, in a position as if he's about to put his shoes on. Reality starts feeling a little sharper.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"I have a shift..." there's blinding light as he checks his phone, "in about half an hour." It's 5:28 am. He has a shift at 6.

"Did you sleep at all?" I ask him. His shrug is nonchalant, meaning no. He didn't.

"Micah." I whisper, my voice pleading.

"What?"

"When was the last time you slept."

He shrugs again, and his eyes shift to the window. He needs to go. Anxiety fills my chest. I don't want to be left alone.

"I'm going with you." The words fall from my lips, I even begin to get myself out of bed .

"No, you go back to sleep. You're exhausted." He says.

"No I don't want..." but I trail off. As much as I don't want to be alone, I can't just sit in McDonald's for his entire shift. I'm too tired.

"I'll tell you what," he says, "you go back to sleep, I'll go to work, I'll be back here as soon as I'm done. Before you know it. I have a sponsor I have to go visit, we can go together."

"A sponsor?" I ask blankly.

"Yeah. For Instagram. A local business wants me to make a quick visit. It's nothing." He tells me. "In fact, I was going to ask you to come with me anyway."

I breathe a shaky breath, and nod. Knowing there's a concrete plan in place settles the deep unease. "Okay, yeah."

"I'll meet you back here after my shift? It ends at 11." 

"Okay." I repeat. I wait while he puts his shoes on, gets out of bed, and goes to the window.

"Before you know it." He smiles, his white teeth glinting in the faint light of dawn.

I nod, and as he climbs out my window, while I lay back down...

It really does seem in no time at all that I wake back up, jolting startlingly upright again, this time very much alert. I sit in the bright sunlight for a few minutes before pulling myself to my feet. It's 9. Counting the hours on my fingers, I still haven't had very much sleep considering, but I get up anyway. I wash my hair, throw on some clothes, and then I'm out the door to quickly get through my rounds and head to McDonald's. I want to beat Micah. There's no way I'm sitting around and waiting for him to show up, the anticipation would overtake me.