The Fault Line (GxG)

30. Sometimes I wish I hadn't met you

Before spring arrives, dad and I always check if the herd's fences are alright. Making sure there are no holes or that it's not loose in any places. It's too much of a struggle for grandad to go around, and it will take him longer.  Until now, there have been a few places we needed to fix, but nothing major. Sometimes we have to cut it off and place new ones on the wooden poles. 

The weather has been our side, the sun shining brightly to the point where it's not been cold as it usually is as I'm wearing a hoodie. Haven't been raining in a couple of days, which is nice for a change. 

"I met Nico and her mother at the shop today," My father said as he hammered down a new pole to the ground. I ignored him as I went down the fence to check it, yet it looks fine. 

"I haven't met her parents before, so it was nice to meet Addison; she seems nice," Dad smiled, and I only shrugged. 

"Nico was off though," Dad stopped everything he was doing, and I took the hint that he wanted to talk about this. Even though I wish we could end it now. 

"She only said hi and disappeared, so I ended up taking to her mother instead," He tilted his head as I squat down and picked up a few grass straws to distract myself with. 

"Addison understand that you are angry and hurt. She tried to make Nico talk to you about it before, yet Nico didn't. But she is worried about her daughter, saying that she hasn't been well," He explained, and I took a deep breath as I let the words sink in. I still feel betrayed, yet I miss her constantly, and I want her back. 

"You never mentioned that Nico had a twin sister," He said, and I looked up at him, narrowing my eyes as the sun hit my eyes. 

"It wasn't mine to say," I answered. 

"That's true," He smiled, and I stared back at the ground in the endless war of my conflict. I hadn't spoken to her since last week when we were at the mall. It didn't end well in any way. I pushed that girl onto the floor, which was wrong of me to do. But she made me angry, and as I was already in agony, I burst. 

"I think you should go and talk to her," Dad told me.

"I don't want to," I replied, and he furrowed his eyebrows.

"Why not?" He asked with curiosity, and I sucked on my lip as I thought about my response. 

"Nico is going to leave me; it would hurt less now than it would then," I explained to him, and he nodded slowly.

"So you are just going to leave it like that?" He asked, and I stood up. 

"Nico should have told me from the beginning that she was going to leave. It would have stopped me from jumping into this," I sighed and threw the pieces of grass back on the ground. 

"Maybe that was why she didn't do it because she was scared you didn't want to be with her if not," Dad said, and he might be right. Nico did tell me that she liked me right from the start. 

"Doesn't make it okay, though," I responded. 

"No, of course not, but you have to keep in mind that she lost her sister, and now she is losing you too. She didn't get to say goodbye to her sister; that's the least you could give her," His words hit me like a punch in the chest. I have never thought about it in that way. Perhaps I have been too selfish at this point. 

"But I don't want to say goodbye," I said and clenched my jaw in discomfort.

"Then you don't," He shrugged. 

"The distance is not going to be easy, and it will hurt most of the time, but that doesn't mean it won't work. If you really want to be with her, then fight for it," He said, and I let out a deep breath.