Big Bang Theory : The Twins

The Tangerine Factor

Scene: The apartment living room

Sheldon: Wo de zhing shi Sheldon.

Howard: No, it's Wo de ming zi shi Sheldon. (Makes a hand movement with every syllable.)

Sheldon: Wo de ming zi shi Sheldon. (Copies hand movements.)

Howard: What's this? (Repeats hand movements.)

Sheldon: That's what you did. I assumed as in a number of languages that the gesture was part of the phrase.

Howard: Well it's not.

Sheldon: How am I supposed to know that? As the teacher it's your obligation to separate your personal idiosyncrasies from the subject matter.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.

Sheldon: Why?

Howard: Once you're fluent you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Leonard (entering): Hey!

Sheldon: Mai du lui tsa.

Howard: You just called Leonard a syphilitic donkey.

Sheldon: My apologies Leonard, I'm only as good as my teacher.

Leonard: Why are you learning Chinese?

Sheldon: I believe the Szechuan Palace has been passing off orange chicken as tangerine chicken and I intend to confront them.

Leonard: If I were you, I'd be more concerned by what they're passing off as chicken.

Ariana(storming in): I need to use your window.

Leonard: Oh, yeah, no, sure, go ahead.

Ariana (opening window): Hey Jerkface, you forgot your iPod! (Throws it out.)

Leonard: What's going on?

Ariana: Oh, I'll tell you what's going on, that stupid self-centred bastard wrote about our sex life in his blog. (Out of window) Drop dead, you stupid self-centred bastard! (To Leonard) Thank you. (exit)

Sheldon: Okay, where were we?

Howard: Not now, I have a blog to find.

(Credits sequence)

Scene: Leonard approaches Ariana's door and knocks.

Leonard: Penny, are you okay?

Ariana(voice off): I'm fine, Leonard, just go away.

Leonard: Look, I understand that breaking up with someone can be very painful....

Ariana: GO AWAY!

Leonard: Okay, feel better, bye. (Goes back to apartment) She doesn't want to talk.

Sheldon: Not surprising. Ariana's emotional responses originate from the primitive portion of the brain known as the Amygdala, while speech is centred in the much more recently developed Neocortex. The former can easily overpower the latter giving scientific credence to the notion of being rendered speechless. (Leonard stares at him.) Or maybe she just doesn't want to talk.

Raj (entering): Hey, look, I found an iPod.

Howard: It's smashed beyond repair, what are you going to do with it?

Raj: What else? Sell it on ebay as slightly used.

Leonard: It was Ariana's boyfriend's, they broke up.