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─── ❝ 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐧𝐨𝐚𝐡 ❞ ───
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I CAN STILL REMEMBER THE FEELING of being immersed in water, hovering only inches beneath the surface, in which I could still sense beams of light shining through the colored glass windows. My fingers pinched my nose together as a firm, roughened hand clasped around mine, pulling me back to the surface.
I took in a breath of air, blinking away the water droplets blocking my vision near the bases of my eyelashes. I could then clearly see my family with wide smiles. My little brothers, my proud parents.
This was the day I had surrendered my faith, giving my all to the Lord, just as my parents had wished upon me. My commitment had been sealed this day, and I was happy. So, so happy to just belong.
God had a plan for me, I was told of this all those years I had withstood sitting uncomfortably on wooden pews, a bible in my lap. My whole life was created in the name of his plan, which is why I now wonder why he abandons me after everything. I wasn't sculpted from his very hands only to be made with countless flaws; a leg that could barely hold me upwards without pain, and a sense of cowardliness that had gotten people I cared about hurt, and worse, killed.
My dad had fallen victim to being one of these people, as he was left behind by the officers to keep me alive. And now, Cyn. The girl with fiery burning evermore in her soul. An undying light, never to be put out.
'God's Plan', it was laughable now.
The city was a ways back by now, the girl I had left behind now belonging to the unrested, too. I felt a layer of acid ease down my throat each time I thought back to the way the dead had brought her down, their backs hunched over her body only feet away from the side door. Then came her shouting, and all I did was listen, as I was forced to shut it. I heard as she called out, but the boy I was back there, was nothing but a coward.
