AS THE WORLD FALLS DOWN I RICK GRIMES

Only Human

Only Human

Rick hesitated outside Carl's bedroom door, still reeling from the way he'd broken down in Jessie's arms, almost recoiling from the memory. She'd handled it with admirable aplomb, especially after their argument, calming him down, giving him a glass of water and some tissues, before taking Judith downstairs, discreetly granting him time to pull himself together before facing the others again.

But he'd left after that, taking Judith with him, leaving Carl to make his own way home after he'd expressed an uneasy interest in checking out the makeshift school somebody had set up in their garage, Ron reluctantly offering to show him around, Mikey tagging after them, Enid characteristically disappearing into oblivion. As Rick had made his way down the sidewalk, he'd looked for Alexis, but she was nowhere to be seen, the knowledge making his heart strangely sink in his chest.

If he had to be honest with himself, he didn't give a damn about Alexandria or its people, not even those who went out their way to make him feel welcome. Their walls were to serve to his advantage, shielding his family, not theirs, from the world outside. But Alexis made his heart hesitate, because she was part of this place, building it with her bare hands, Alexandria and Alexis intertwined.

He barely knew her, but something in Alexis called to him, and he had no other option but to answer. They were alike, both broken, but she had managed to save something of herself, whilst he'd sacrificed his soul to stay alive, to keep his family alive. Their fates had followed different roads, Alexis finding shelter from the storm, Rick trying and failing to outrun it. Adversity had strengthened him, whilst Alexandria's walls had weakened Alexis, and here they were, existing at opposite ends of the spectrum.

Rick leaned his forehead against the door, trying to reason with himself, why he would feel this way. "You're losin' your mind, man," he hissed to himself, "you don't even know her..."

But he knew she was brave, possessing courage under fire, standing her ground even when she was terrified. She was stubborn, emotionally erratic, and oddly intense. Vulnerable too, trying to hold herself together even when she was falling apart. But most of all she was defiant, defying him most of all, bulldozing his own walls as she did.

Gritting his teeth, he then went into Carl's room, making his son glance up from the comic book he'd been reading.

"Everything okay, Dad?" Carl asked, brow furrowing.

"Yeah," Rick said, forcing a smile, "how was school?"

Carl wrinkled his nose, the expression saying it all.

"You... you goin' over to Ron's house again?" Rick asked hesitantly, making Carl look sharply at him.

"Maybe, why?" Carl said, brow furrowing.

Rick took a deep breath, realising he had to tell the truth, that Carl would brook no bullshit. "You've seen Alexis's black eye, haven't you?" he said quietly, making Carl sit up, setting down his comic book on the bed beside him.

"Yeah," Carl said, "what of it?"

"Ron's dad did it," Rick said abruptly, "and he's hurtin' his wife as well, probably his sons too. So I don't want you to go over there again" -

- "Until you deal with it?" Carl cut across him, making Rick half turn away, pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. "It's okay, Dad," he said slowly, making Rick look at him, "I get it. You've got to do what you've got to do. He's hurting people, so he has to be stopped."

"It's not as straightforward as that, son," Rick said reluctantly, sitting down on the edge of the bed, "he's the only doctor within these walls. I can't just... take him out, not without thinkin' about the consequences."