I Wish To Die Peacefully

Chapter 16: For The Greater Good

SOPHIA

I found myself again in front of the door to Brother Greyson's room. Looking at the board game in my hands, I took a breath and knocked on the door's smooth mahogany surface.

"Who is it?" came the answer from inside.

"It's me, brother..." I said and heard the permission to open the door.

Brother Greyson is seated on his study table again. No matter how many times I've seen it in the past four months, I still haven't quite gotten used to it. I entered the room and saw a pile of books on the bed.

"What is it, Lottie? Do you need anything?" he asked, looking up from a thick book placed in front of him.

"I'm just wondering if we can play a little... I'm bored," I told him, holding up the board game.

"I'm sorry, Lottie, but can you wait until later? I still have to finish something," he answered. "Have you seen the new dolls that mother and I bought for you? Perhaps you can play with those instead... I'll go fetch you from your room in an hour or so... Let's have tea together, okay?"

It hadn't been the first time my brother turned down a request to play with me, but I still couldn't help but feel disappointed. "Okay..." I said forlornly.

"I'm really sorry..." Brother said one last time with a smile before I left the room.

As I made my way back to my quarters, I immersed myself in my thoughts for the hundredth time.

Time flew by so fast and before I knew it, four months had gone by since I got my memories back after getting separated from my family. During those four months, I began to notice the changes inside the house.

Mother and Father became more protective of me and I wasn't allowed to go out often. When I do get to go out, I was always followed by five bodyguards. Security around the duchy had also increased.

The only thing I liked about the changes was the fact that Mother and Father always find the time to spend with me no matter how busy they are. But apart from that, everything makes me lonely.

The greatest change above all that I couldn't seem to get used to was the demeanor of my brothers. All of a sudden, I don't seem to know them at all. They weren't like what they were before we got separated.

Brother Greyson who was never interested in studying all of sudden buried himself with books inside his room. He told our parents that he wanted to be a mage, thus even though it's still more than a year before he's old enough to go to the Academy, he wanted to get a head start on the qualifying examination. Father got him private tutors as he requested, thus he doesn't have that much free time like he used to.

His personality also changed a lot. For starters, Brother Greyson's tone of voice had always been full of confidence and sometimes, he can say some mean things to the servants and other people outside our family. But now, he's generally quite calm and I've been hearing him apologize for his faults.

There was one afternoon when Brother Grey was walking along the hallway of the first floor with his nose buried in a book and he collided with a maid who couldn't see where she was going with the mountainful of curtains she was carrying. To everyone's surprise, the maid didn't get fired on the spot or even punished because of it. On the other hand, he accepted the maid's apology and even apologized in return, saying that it was also his fault for not paying attention.

When we received some guests on the day that Count Bloom and his family visited, Brother Grey didn't get angry even when the five-year-old twins ran around and bothered him. He even offered his own toys for the children to play with. To my surprise, he didn't go out to play with Vincent Bloom who was one of his friends. He just chatted with him a little before excusing himself and going to the sitting room to continue reading.