I could feel the tension We could cut it with a knife I know it's more than just a friendship
I can hear you think I'm right, yeah Do I gotta convince you That you shouldn't fall asleep?
It'll only be a couple hours And I'm about to leave
Do you got plans tonight? I'm a couple hundred miles from Japan, and I I was thinkin' I could fly to your hotel tonight
'Cause I can't get you off my mind
- Lost In Japan, Shawn Mendes
•••
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"Sunshine hurry it up, it's already 10:30"
I shouted to my girlfriend who decided that watching Friends reruns on the hotel tv was a better idea than getting ready for our night out in the city
No you didn't misread, I did call Efi my girlfriend.
Right after she told me that she loved me too, I asked her to be my girlfriend. I would be a fool to not take the chance of officially making Efi mine.
She's always been the better half of me, in everything. Even when we were merely just friends, she's always completed me in every aspect.
Her strengths are my weakness and her weaknesses are my strengths.
She's short, I'm tall. She's extrovert, I'm an introvert. She's a morning person, I'm a night owl, etc.
She's my other half, and I can't believe it's taken me this long to finally tell her how I felt.
With all the events in my life, the picture that love had painted scared me. Love for me had always ended in pain, hurt, regret. I was afraid of it- terrified even, but being loved by Efi...
Being loved by Efi is a feeling that I could never explain, it's a feeling that I could never put into words. The closest I could ever get is feeling whole, as I said, she completes me... she makes me whole.
She never made me like I was weak for feeling the way I felt about love and relationships, instead she told me it was ok to feel that way.
~FLASHBACK~ 1 Year Ago Age 30
It was a few days after our rendezvous with Santiago and I somehow remember my drunk rant that lead me to telling her about Maddie.
Embarrassed and ashamed of myself is all I felt the moment those memories came back.
I facepalmed myself
"Darren how more can you embarrass yourself, at this point you should quit your job and sell the clinic to become a professional embarrassment. Since that seems to be all you're able to do in-front of her." I talked out loud to myself as I paced around my at home office
