Mr. Halloway's Pet

Chapter Twenty Eight

It's 3AM and sleep is the last thing on my mind. Drea is tucked into a ball, her hand lightly grabbing my left bicep. She appears to be sleeping peacefully, and I can only hope that her sleep isn't being plagued by nightmares or sneaky memories.

I know all too well about how they can poison the subconscious and plague us where we're most defenseless.

Perhaps that's the very reason I'm struggling to find sleep now.

There's too much to think about, I feel as if my head could explode just reviewing the things brining on my stove. I've got 3 tea kettle screaming at me, water boiling over, and eggs that have somehow caught fire.

All while the fire alarm blares in the background. I've lost control of my kitchen and I'm too panicked to find the solutions to any of these responsibilities.

Not to mention school is still something I've left unsupervised on a back burner.

I glance to Drea in the midst of my chaotic thinking and feel a twinge of guilt.

It's a bit selfish of me to disregard the fact that she hasn't been to school in a week and just got assaulted by her own father. The weight of not even knowing if he's alive or not is still clawing at her feet, too. Yet she still remains strong. A bit shaken, but still strong and reassuring.

Turning onto my side to get a better line of sight, I analyze her features and think back to the beginning of the school year. Where we all were nothing but normal high schoolers going on with our everyday lives.

It seems so bright and light as a feather in my memories. Walking down the hall with her arm around my shoulders and talking about the diner. It feels so far away now, so far away it makes me homesick. How does one feel homesick with a memory?

A tear escapes my eye as I long for the feel of that simplicity. My heart hurts thinking about how much it desires to be in that lighthearted moment.

Now it's dark and dreary. No light shines at the end of our tunnel and I don't find that very fair.

I don't want to walk in the darkness ahead of me. I can feel the sludge weighing my feet and the fear of my blind pursuit for happiness.

Happiness that I know in my heart will never be found.

I'm not strong enough for this journey.

As that thought is displayed behind my eyes, I have to seal my lips shut in an attempt to silence a sob.

However, it still sounds so loud in the quiet room. My eyes are squeezed shut and I paw the moisture off the bridge of my nose.

When I open my eyelids again, I'm met with Drea's big blue eyes filled with concern.

"Paige?" She asks groggily, rubbing her face before lifting herself up onto an elbow.

"Hm?" I hum, trying my hardest to hide any sign of my distress.

I'm still on my side, as is she, and the only thing keeping her from seeing the evidence of tears is the darkness that I hope doesn't reveal too much.

"Paige, what's wrong?" She asks, leaning closer and poking my cheek. Confirming that it is, in fact, my pansy ass crying, she sits up.

I follow her movement, suppressing any more emotion that may lead to that same vulnerability responsible for snuffing the light from my mind.

"Nothing, it's all good. Just go back to sleep." I say reassuringly, my voice only cracking once.

"Don't give me that shit. You think I don't know how you feel? You really don't have to hide that from me. You always try, but I hope you know you're horrible at it." Her words are a little joking, but so genuine another tear sheds.