TW: ED CONTENT
I felt myself slipping again. Marlene and Remus had to drag me to meals, Lily was pulling me out of the dorm to socialize with our friends, Pete was slipping my favorite treats in my room in hopes I'd eat them, and James was threatening to write home. I had slipped.
The thing about relapsing was it felt inevitable and like it would last forever. Every time I got better I knew I'd get worse again. Every time I got worse again it felt like I wouldn't make it out. I'd laid in my bed between classes and meals for two weeks already. I only got up on the weekends to serve my sentence in detention. Now that was done, I figured I'd spend my days rotting in my bed, fighting with my friends when they pulled me out.
Marlene finally caved and did the one thing she could think of that might help before they were forced to write mum and tell her they were worried about me and that I should go back to my therapist. She told Regulus.
"Nova?" She asked as I laid in my bed with my back to her. I hummed.
"I'm not getting up Marls." I heard her sigh.The door opened and closed, then I felt a weight on my bed. I rolled over to see a rather concerned boy with dark hair and sorry eyes staring back at me. I sat up.
"What's going on with you love?" He asked. I shrugged. He grabbed my hand gently. I bit my cheek to hold back tears. "What's your vice?"
"What do you mean?"
"Darling, I know a relapse when I see one."
"Anorexia." I replied, it came out more like a question. It felt like he was asking what drugs I was addicted to, or what alcohol I reached for. He smiled kindly at me.
"Merlin, when they said they were going to write your mum and you'd go away again I figured you had a hidden heroin addiction." He replied, I let out a little laugh. He rubbed the back on my hand with his thumb.
"My mum told me that if it got bad again she'd send me to one of those rehab places where they weigh you every day and force feed you bread."
"I could very well weigh you every day and force feed you bread if that's all it takes." I laughed again. He wasn't joking, but he was trying to lighten the mood. "You've gotta eat Nova. I've told you I quite like you alive."
"I wish it was that easy. The second food starts to feel or taste like, well, food my entire brain shuts down and I feel like I'll vomit with every bite. So, I just stop." I shrugged.
"How can I help darling?"
"Be patient with me?"
"Anything you need. Would you like to sneak out for a sweet?" I pointed to my desk where my sweets from Peter had piled up. He grabbed two boxes and brought them over. "Should I be worried about who sent these?"
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A week later, I was slowly but surely pulling myself out of the hole. I didn't do it alone though. James made a plate of all my favorite foods for every meal before I got there, Peter kept delivering sweets, Regulus always shared them with me when we met. I was starting to feel normal again.
I sat in the astronomy tower while Regulus handed me a handful of jelly beans.
"How are you today, darling?" He asked. I smiled.
"I'm well. Tired, but well."
"You look well."
"What do you want Reggie?" I asked. As soon as the nickname left my mouth I panicked, he smiled.
"Been talking to my brother have you?"
"What?" He shook his head with a grin.
"Oh, nothing. What makes you think I want something?" He asked as he scooted closer, he set his hand on top of mine and intertwined our fingers. He began to kiss my neck. I tiled my head unconsciously so he could continue.
"You're being too sweet. You must want something." He stopped kissing my neck right at my ear.
"Should I worry about Pettigrew bringing you all your favorite sweets all the time?" He whispered lowly.
"No." I replied as I swallowed hard. He knew exactly what he was doing. He let out a hot breath on my neck.
"Really? Seems to fancy you." He was still whispering right below my ear. I felt my face run hot. I closed my eyes. I was sick of talking, I wanted his lips back on me.
"He doesn't, not like that'd matter anyways."
"Why wouldn't that matter darling?" Oh for fucks sake. I closed my eyes tighter.
"Because we're dating, Regulus."
"He doesn't know that."
"He bloody well will if he ever tries something." He chuckled lowly in my ear.
"I'll make sure everyone knows you're mine if they try anything with you, love." He resumed kissing my neck while I let out a breath. He chuckled against my skin at the affect he had on me. I didn't care if he knew, I wanted him to know. Regulus Black had a hold on me that, even if I knew this was the worst decision I had ever made in my life, I never wanted him to let go.
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"We shagged!" I cheered as I walked in my dorm. Marlene leapt off her bed and ran to me.
"Tell me everything!" She squealed as she pulled me to my bed. Lily moved so she was laying facing us. I laughed.
"We shagged and it was really good." I offered. Marlene rolled her eyes.
"Oh come on! You haven't shagged anyone since-"
"We don't talk about that." I reminded her, she nodded.
"Details! Was it big? Did you finish? Was it worth all this time waiting? What's he like in bed?" Lily threw her head back in laughter as I covered my face.
"Yes. Yes, he made sure of it. Definitely worth it. And gentle but also rough? I don't know Marls it was good sex, I can tell you that."
"And here I was thinking you'd become a nun on us."
"Jesus Marls, I haven't shagged anyone either. Am I a nun?" Lily joked, Marlene shook her head.
"No your Lily, perfect, innocent, Lily flower. She's big bad Nova Potter. She has a reputation to upkeep." I rolled my eyes.
"You're the worst." I shoved her off my bed. She caught herself and smiled.
"You love me so."
