Catfished

O n e

18th December 2019

Billie's POV

Im gay. Well i think. You may know me as Billie Eilish. One of the main questions i get asked in an interview is 'Do you regret becoming famous at such a young age?' Well the answer is yes but not for the reason i usually give. Yes i would love to live my teenage years being able to do stupid things and making dumb decisions without being watched by the members of the public but I would also want to spend those years trying to figure out who I am. My sexuality.

"If you want a good girl then goodbye" I sang into the mic while walking off the stage finishing my first proper tour. Even though it was only 10 shows in the US and 1 in Canada. It's a start. Singing was something I've always loved doing and preforming was something I've wanted to do since I went to watch the neighbourhood live. The atmosphere was just something I can't even begin to describe and from that moment I wanted my shows to feel like that. A getaway.

Even though you would expect after the show to be so much quieter I still couldn't escape from the noise backstage. The first person I met backstage was Justin, my manager handing me my water bottle that had been the fridge. "God Billie you did so good out there. Your going to be on worldwide tours before you know it" I thanked him and entered the green room shutting and locking the door behind me.

Taking a deep breath I slide down the wall next to the door running my hands through my hair trying to focus on my breathing. Something that isn't talked about a lot is what the performers feel after the show. Obviously there is the adrenaline and the excitement of being on that stage but then once that dies down the feeling of being overwhelmed kicks in.

A couple of minutes later there is a knock on the door. I built up the energy to pull me up from off the floor and open the door to reveal my concerned looking brother, Finneas. "You did so well out there Bil" he expressed bringing me into a hug yet his voice was laced with concern. "mom and dad have organised a party for you not far away. I know you weren't really bothered about celebrating your birthday but they wanted to even if it's just a little get together" he said pulling out of the hug, picking up my bag and made sure I was coming with him to the car that's going to take us to the venue.

Don't get me wrong I don't mind my birthday. I feel like when your young you love it. The presents, the cake just the whole day in general but as you get older I feel like it just becomes like another day at least that's what it feels like to me. The car parks outside what looks to be like an pub here in Washington. Finn opens the door first walking up the stairs and stopping at the top of the stairs and pointed at a door. "They are in there but at least act surprised. I wasn't suppose to tell you" he whispered in my ear while taking a step back allowing me to open the door.

I step in the dark room and I felt like I was at ease. For a second it was dark and quiet something my migraine had been longing for since the start of the show but obviously that didn't last. As soon as I had stepped fully into the room the lights came on and everyone yelled happy birthday making me slightly grimace at the noise but quickly masked it with surprise and happiness.

"Omggg guyss" I said putting on a fake laugh while covering my face with my hands people are being surprised do but mainly because my head couldn't deal with all the flashing lights. "You didn't have to do this all but thank you" I said stepping more into the room as everyone goes back to the conversation they were having before my mom probably told them to shush it.

"Happy Birthday Bil"  my mom practically yelled while walking over to me bringing me into a hug.

"You didn't have to do this mom honesty" I said but completely meaning unlike those fake bitches that would pout if they had anything less.

"It's your 18th birthday honey you deserve it plus you just finished your first tour so if you don't want to see it as a birthday party it can be an end of tour party" she reasoned with me while pulling away and standing next to my dad. I brought him into a hug and had the same conversation.

"Wheeresssss the birthday girlllll!!!" Claudia yelled walking into the room somehow yelling over the noise and walking directly to the table by the door, putting a gift bag and running over to me bringing me into a hug. I swear she is like a sister I never had.

"How was the concert" she asked bringing me into a hug while I told her about it. We separated from the hug and she went over to Finneas hugging him and lightly kissing him before turning her attention onto mom and dad. I wish I had their type of relationship you know matter of fact I just wish I had someone that love me in a romantic way.

The party went on for a couple of hours and it became slightly more enjoyable after taking some Advil. I was saying goodbye to everyone when Zoe mentioned something that we had talked about ages ago. "So when are you getting on those dating apps to find your perfect man" she said lightly nudging my side. I mean Finn and Claudia met on a dating app and look at them so what could go wrong? but maybe I won't just looked at the men.

-1009 words