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Ch. 28: Going For Gold

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As I stepped into the pool room, the lights came on automatically, although they were dimmer than during the day, bathing the huge space in a soft, muted glow.

I hadn't realised there were lights set into the pool walls, throwing some areas of the water into stark relief, while others looked darker than normal, especially at the deep end.

Panic clawed at my chest, and I closed my eyes, taking deep, even breaths.

Earlier today, I'd stood in front of that fear and refused to let it beat me. If I'd done it once, I could do it again.

I undressed slowly, methodically, giving myself time to adjust to how I was feeling, and folded my clothes neatly on one of the loungers.

Then I approached the pool.

"Just you and me this time," I murmured.

Finn had helped me earlier, and I couldn't find words to express how grateful I was, but I needed to go one step further, for my own sake.

I needed to face this alone.

I moved onto the first step, still slow, still adjusting.

Then the second step.

My chest fluttered.

Three steps still to go.

Lifting my chin, I stepped onto the third, then the fourth.

I stared at the pool. The pool stared back at me.

My feet touched the fifth step.

"You've got this," I told myself.

My chest still felt tight, and that was okay. I hadn't expected to completely shed my fears, but I could face them and overpower them now.

I stepped into the pool.

Since I still couldn't swim, I wouldn't risk going out of my depth again, so I stuck to the shallower end of the pool, and when the water was past my waist, I stopped.

I sculled the water with my hands, feeling it move against my skin, inhaling the chlorine smell of it. It wasn't going to hurt me.

I was stronger than my fears.

Pinching my nose closed, I bent my knees and sank beneath the water.

My heart slammed into my chest, my muscles went tense, and a wail of panic built in my throat.

I clamped my mouth shut, refusing to let it out.

I sank further down, until I was sitting on the bottom of the pool, and then I pulled my knees close to my chest and stared at the water around me.

Maybe I'd never be comfortable in the open ocean, and that was actually okay. I could do this.

And if I could do this, then there were other things I could do, like diving and swimming. Finn would love that. He'd insisted he'd have me swimming before the snow melted, and it looked like he might be right.

Smug, gorgeous bastard.

A straining feeling in my lungs reminded me that I still needed to breathe. I uncrossed my legs, planted my feet on the bottom of the pool, and pushed up. As my head broke the surface, my heart almost leaped out of my chest – a dark figure stood by the pool, watching me.

"Finn?" I spluttered, wiping water from my eyes. "You scared the crap out of me."

"Sorry, I was trying not to interrupt," he said.

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