Never ending

Part one

Part one~

"Reita! I think I am going outside for a while! Okay?" I shoutout from the door to my boyfriend in the couch.

"Yeah, but come back before it gets dark so nothing happens!" He shouts back.

"I will, love you!"

"Love you too Ruki!"

With that said, I step out, close the door behind me and starts to walk. Just walking nowhere. Anywhere is good enough. I just want to escape my never ending anxiety. It's welling inside me and I can do nothing to stop it. Sometimes it becomes too much and then I fall to the floor and can't breath. That makes my boyfriend panic a bit, because I haven't told him about my anxiety.

I can't really control my feet, I am just walking.

I find myself standing on the train station, I don't know why, I just got here.

"Hm, maybe I can go home to Kai."

I wait for the right train to come and go on it. As usual it's crowded, but I don't really care. I pick my phone out of my pocket and text Reita.

'Hey, I stay over at Kai's place tonight<3'

I know Kai will let me stay, he always does.

'Okay, see you tomorrow<3' , is my respond from Reita.

I lay the phone back into my pocket.

The small trip takes only five minutes and I come to Kai quickly.

There's something I want to talk to Kai about, lucky he lives two minutes from the station.

What am I going to talk to Kai about? My anxiety.

The wind is cold and it wipes some tears away from my face. I can never cry in front of Reita, he wants to know what's wrong, and I don't want to bother him. But then he feels like a bad boyfriend, even if he isn't, he is the best one I ever could have.

Now I am standing in front of Kai's door and I knock. Kai opens after a short while and blinks a little.

"Ruki? Come in." He says and let's me enter.

"Thank you Kai."

"So Ruki, you only show up here if something is bothering you, what's wrong?"

To be continued..