Owen

Playing Hooky

I wasn't ready to face Jaelyn or Drew or anyone really.

I purposefully made my dad late for work so that when I told him to just leave me at home he didn't argue.

Nan was in my dads room, gathering laundry and cleaning, leaving me alone in the kitchen with my breakfast I had no appetite for.

Why did it suck so much? I knew it was coming.

I knew she was cheating.

Finding out that it was Drew though had sent a knife through my heart. I couldn't tell if I was more angry or sad. Maybe it was both equally.

My phone vibrated across the dining room table, I shoved a sausage link across my plate with my fork, glancing at the screen.

It was my fifth text from Alec.

I unlocked my screen thinking maybe this time I'd respond. Maybe I'd tell him. Maybe I'd ask if he knew. If he'd just been lying to me the whole time. For however long it had been.

Alec: where are you?

Alec: are you coming?

Alec: everything okay?

Alec: Owen?

Alec: will you just text me back?

I didn't text him back. I couldn't even type out my question. The thought of doing so made anxiety spread through my body. What if he knew this whole time? Was everyone just laughing at me behind my back?

I couldn't stomach the thought.

My phone vibrated again.

Jaelyn: hey bae are you not in school?

I ground my teeth together, pushing my plate of food away from me. I grabbed my phone, opening Jaelyn's text message, fueled by anger.

My fingers tapped away at the screen, telling her that I knew, that I couldn't believe she'd do that to me, that I never wanted to see her again. I was mean, not holding back anything. But just as I went to hit send, I paused. My eyes scanning what I wrote.

I couldn't send it.

I couldn't blame her for all of it.

Drew was just as responsible.

I watched the letters disappear as I deleted all the hate that I typed.

I still wanted the full story. I wanted to know how long, who knew, why they did it. Was it happening before I got hurt? Or was it just another bi product of my stupid fucking mistake that night at the party?

And I wouldn't get any of those answers if I exploded on them through a text. I had to be smart. I had to be patient.

I took a deep breath, leaving my breakfast to go cold on the table. Nan was coming out of the hallway while I was headed for my room, her arms full with a laundry basket.

"Did you finish your breakfast?"

"No." I said it more harshly than I needed to.

"Are you feeling okay Love?" She asked.

I wheeled past her, ignoring her. It wasn't her fault but she was here and I was mad and I had no other way to deal with the anger that was eating away at my insides.

"Owen?"

I was almost to my room, she had turned to follow me, leaving the basket in the hallway.

"Come here." She said, her voice stern.

I kept going, a mountain of emotions building inside of me. Was there anything else I could possibly lose? Anything else the universe wanted to take away from me? There was no way anything could get any worse.

I was crippled. I'd lost my scholarship. I'd lost my best friend. And I'd lost my girlfriend.

I had nothing going for me.

"Owen Nikolas!" Nan yelled as I rounded the corner into my room. "What is going on?"

"Fuckin' leave me alone." I snapped.

Her foot steps pounded into the floor, her face appearing in front of mine, arms braced against my chair to stop me. Her graying hair was brushed back away from her face, her brown eyes fierce and daring me to sass her back.

I knew better than to cuss at Nan. But I just wanted to wallow in my own pity.

"Knock it off right now." She said through gritted teeth.

I dropped my eyes to my lap, tears pooling in them. I'd been a minute since I felt this low, since I let any tears out.

I felt her place her hand on my cheek, I shifted away, knowing that if I looked up the tears would definitely fall. I didn't want to admit to anyone that Drew and Jaelyn had affected me that much. I was still trying to wrap my head around it.

"I'm sorry." I muttered, my words just above a whisper.

"Want to tell me what's going on then?" Her voice was softer but I still didn't look up, I just shook my head instead. Nan let out a sigh, righting herself. "Are you wanting to lie down?"

"I can do it."

Ever since I'd called Mina scared shitless the other morning I'd been successful at getting myself in and out of my chair. It was the only thing going right in my life at the moment.

"Please." I pressed, knowing she'd rather help than let me struggle through the process on my own.

She shifted on her feet, her hands rested on her hips. I needed this. I needed this one small thing. I needed her to let me do it alone. I silently begged her to understand.

She let out a resigned breath. "I'll be in the living room, just yell."

I nodded my head, relief washing over me. I listened to her footsteps grow softer as she left my room, lingering in the doorway for a moment.

At the last second, I quietly thanked her.