His Best Friend's Sister

Chapter 19

I don't know how it happened, but by mid-May, Jonathan and I were going out on dates almost every week. I liked Jonathan. He was a good conversationalist, and an overall friendly guy. We had some things in common, like how we were deep thinkers, and our love of sociology. Yet I couldn't shake the feeling that he was just a platonic friend that I was spending too much time with to enjoy his company in its full potential.

Jonathan didn't feel like that, though. I was confirmed of this when one day in school, he started holding my hand. I felt awkward entwining my fingers in his, like they didn't belong there in his grasp. I thought about how different his hands felt from Ricky's. Ricky's hands felt warm and large. He had small callouses from when he held his stick without gloves and our fingers fit together like puzzle pieces. I didn't get somersaults in my stomach when Jonathan looked at me or brushed a hair out of my eyes. In a way, it was refreshing to be able to be publicly romantic with someone. Unfortunately, it just wasn't the someone I had in mind.

It was also refreshing that I didn't find myself overthinking everything I said and did to Jonathan, like I used to when I first started talking to Ricky. What didn't ease my thoughts, however, was the undeniable fact that the more comfortable I became with Ricky, the more comfortable I was in myself, too. In fact, lately, I hadn't been overthinking at all, but rather saying things on impulse. Especially when it came to the things I said to Alexander and Robin. I pondered over the feelings that maybe it wasn't Jonathan who made me feel more confident, but rather a confidence that I had given to myself.

The most baffling part for me was that Alexander saw Jonathan taking me out on these dates, heard Jonathan and I talking on the phone, and even saw me and Jonathan holding hands at school. He never said a thing. This was all I had ever wanted – Alexander not butting in when it comes to my life. Alexander not having an opinion on who I dated, or making his overprotective presence known. Yet, now that it was happening, I couldn't help but feel an emptiness. It was a void that he had once filled with his meddling. Now that I didn't have it at all anymore, I missed it.

"We should totally double date," Bianca said to me one day during school at my locker. "Brad and Jonathan get along really well, they've even hung out without us."

"Uh, yeah, sure," I replied absentmindedly.

Bianca continued to talk about Brad and Jonathan when something in the distance behind her caught my eye. Ricky was wearing a bright yellow t-shirt with jeans and he was striding down the hallway, exuding confidence and charm as per usual. His hair had grown a little bit longer and there was a thick wavy lock hanging down on his forehead. The top of his chocolate brown tresses appeared fluffier than they had been just a few weeks before.

Ricky and I had been avoiding each other as best as possible for the past few weeks. If ever we wound up in the same hallway, one of us would take a quick detour out. We sat on opposite ends of the cafeteria. I still saw Rex occasionally, and he would give me a playful shove whenever he could, but Ricky wouldn't look into my eyes anymore.

One can imagine my surprise, then, when I witnessed him gliding down the hallway in that yellow shirt right towards what looked like my locker. In a heartbeat, our eyes locked on each other, and I knew he was coming to talk to me. Bianca's chatter continued but had faded out in my mind as all I could focus on was Ricky fast approaching me, a look of determination on his face. Within his fierce determinedness, there was also a vulnerability; a look of worry. His eyes pierced right into mine and there was an unspoken physical connection between us despite the fact that were metres apart.

As I prepared for our contact, my vision suddenly became black and I felt two hands covering over my eyes from behind.

"Huh?" I puzzled, placing my hands over the forces that were now blocking my vision of Ricky.