Red Vs Blue, & there's Magenta: Season Two

Chapter 12 Room for Rent

Tucker: Well, that was a great story. I especially like the part of Church getting pantsed in high school.

The Blues were still outside near the tank.

Church: I found that part to be entirely out of context.

Tucker: But I still don't get how we're supposed to stop the A.I.

Tex: I don't remember much from the implantation process. I do remember that the A.I. can be transmitted from host to host by way of the helmet radios. Before I learned anything else, the A.I. took over and we escaped. If we can kill the A.I. and not give it a place to jump, we'll beat it.

Church: And then I can have my body back, deal?

Tex: Deal.

Church: Alright, Tex and I will possess Caboose then. Tucker, we need you to work on the Reds.  Get them to turn off their helmet radios so that's O'Malley won't have anywhere to go once we get him there.

Tex: That'll go poorly. Guess I'll be contacting Ruby.

A message box appeared on her/Lopez's visor. She had installed a way for them to communicate, when she was in another body, into Ruby's helmet.

Allison- Hey, when the cyan guy goes over there, turn off your radio.

Ruby- Wait Why?

Allison- You'll see.

Meanwhile. . .

Tucker: What?! How am I supposed to do that?

Church: I don't know, come up with a plan.

Tucker: Come on, you know how I feel about plans.

Tex: You're not gonna have much time once we get in there, so move fast.

Tucker: Oh I see, you have no idea what I should do or how I should do it, but whatever I do, I should do it fast?

Church: Yeah, that's right.

Tex: Yup.

Tucker: Wow, you guys are a lot of help.

Church: Try shifting your paradigm. Think outside the box.

Tucker: Hey, the box is there for a reason. I like thinking inside it. I feel safe in there.

Church: Okay, Tex. Ladies first.

Tex: Yeah, right! You think I'm gonna leave you here alone with your body?

Church: Bitch.

Tex: Nice try Leonard.

Church: Hey, Caboose!

Caboose: Huh?

Church: Heads up.

Ghost Church ran forward and jumped into Caboose!

O"Malley: Nooooo!

Church and Tex appeared in Caboose's mindscape. It was covered in silvery pillars and dull gray walls.

Church: Woah, where are we?

Tex: We're in Caboose's mind. Now we just have to find O'Malley and kill him.

Church: Man, this is kinda weird.

Tex: It's hard to get used to, I know.

Church: No, it's not that.

*In the Real World*

Church talked through Caboose.

Church: It's just that this place is a lot bigger than I thought it was gonna be.

Tucked: Caboose, are you okay there buddy?

Caboose: This place is a lot bigger than I thought it would be.

Tucker: Okay. . . I'm gonna take Sheila and Lopez and figure out some way to get the Reds to shut off their radios.

Caboose: Where should we start Tex?

*In Caboose's Mindscape*

Church: I said, where should we start Tex?

Tex: Just keep your eyes peeled.

Suddenly, Tucker appeared behind the two.

Tex: I guarantee O'Malley will come looking for us.

Church: Hey, Tucker, is that you?

Tucker(Caboose): No, what are you stupid? Oh wait, yes. I am me. I guess I'm stupid.

Church: What're you doing in here? You're supposed to be out there working on your part of the plan!

As they spoke, a dark figure sped across Caboose's mind, going unseen.

Tucker(Caboose): Do you have any food? I love to eat all the food.

Church: What the hell? What's the matter with you?

Tex: This isn't really Tucker. We're in Caboose's head. This is Caboose's mental image of Tucker.

Tucker(Caboose): Man, I am so unbelievably stupid.

Church: Well that's great. Everyone we meet in here is bound to be as brain dead as Caboose then.

Caboose's mental image of himself then appeared!

Caboose(Caboose): I would not be so sure about that Mister Church.

*With the Reds*

Grif and Sarge were inside the base.

Grif: Great idea sir, I finally agree with you.

Donut: Hey guys we might have a problem here!

The pink soldier walked inside.

Donut: Somebody, I'm not gonna say who, might've thought that one of the Cyborg parts we need for Simmons's surgery was cupholder. And somebody, not naming any names here, might've left it along with their favorite smooth jazz compilation CD, in the Warthog. I just don't know who would do such a thing.

Grif: Was it you?

Donut: Yeah- Uh no! *clears throat* I mean, no. Dammit.

Sarge: Grif, you and easy listening stroll on down and retrieve that part from the Warthog posthaste!

Ruby: You guys do know this a horrible idea right?

The girl just entered the base.

Grif: Besides, do you even think it's safe to be outside the base right now? For all we know, the Blues could've already fixed their tank.

Ruby: Which is why you guy should STOP taking parts from the Warthog!

Sarge: Ahhh! Corny dogs! Even with Lopez helping 'em, it'll take months to get that tank online. Much less to get it movin' again.

Ruby: Stop. Ignoring. Me.

The sergeant felt a chill run up his spine.

Sarge: *gulps* Yes ma'am.

Donut: I hope you're right though, Sarge, because if I see a tank headed towards me, I'm totally gonna freak out.

*With the Blues*

Lopez stood atop Sheila while Tucker stood in front of them. They were currently in the middle of the canyon.

Tucker: Man, I hope they don't totally freak out when they see us coming.