✨total and utter chaos✨ a criminal minds Chatfic

27

a/n: do me a favour and pretend Evermore by Taylor Swift released around 2010/2011? Tyty xx

||hot whores 🥵🤙||

Derek: pretty boy why u looking at the bartender like u wanna kill her

Emily: Lilly's flirting with her

Penelope: don't be jealous boy wonder!! I'm sure it won't come to anything serious ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

JJ: I mean... it could 🤷🏼‍♀️

Penelope: JJ stop ruining Leid >:(

JJ: I'm just saying!

Derek: technically Strauss did that 🤷🏾‍♂️

Hotch: do you guys remember when I told you not to talk about it?

Emily: remember when Lilly said she doesn't care if we talk abt it? 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐

Lilly: remember when u said I was flirting with the bartender? There's a reason for that, stop cockblocking me 😡😡😡😡😡😡

Spencer: you could always just mute the chat or turn your phone off.

Lilly: oh yeh! Thx reid 👍🫶

[Lilly has gone offline]

Derek: that was never gonna help at all kid 🤦🏾‍♂️🤦🏾‍♂️🤦🏾‍♂️

JJ: you realise you just helped her in getting laid by that bartender right? 😬😬😬😬

Emily: I can't blame her that bartender is HOT 😩🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

Derek: ...

Spencer: ......

Penelope: ..................

JJ: ahem......... 😃🤨

Emily: OH SHIT!

JJ: OH SHIT INDEED EMILY

Penelope: oh no 😖😖

Derek: OH YES 🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿

JJ: SHUT UP MORGAN

Emily: SHUT UP U PINT SIZED PRICK

Derek: damn sorry for party rocking 😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢

Emily: NO LIKE NOWHERE NEAR AS HOT AS U JJ IM JUST SAYING SHES HOT FOR LILLY

JJ: .........

Emily: AS IN LIKE SHES 100% LILLYS TYPE LIKE LOOK AT HER

JJ: .........

Emily: LIKE SHES GOT THE WHOLE SCRAGGLY HAIRCUT GOING ON IWTH THE LIGHT BROWN HAIR AND SHES A LANKY TWIG AND SHES 100000% A GEEK LOOK AT HER

JJ: .........

Emily: SO LIKE SHES HOT FROM LILLYS POINT OF VIEW NOT MINE UR LIKE THE HOTTEST WOMAN IVE EVER MET—

Emily: why are you smiling like that? Why's everyone laughing?

JJ: bc u r adorable when u get flustered 😊❤️😊❤️

Penelope: OMG LOOK AT HOW RED HER FACE IS!!!! 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

JJ: yeah and shes stunning 🤩

[Lilly is online]

Derek: hey lover girl 😏😏

Lilly: hey PG quick question?

Penelope: go ahead my amazing crime fighter 🫶🫶

Lilly: evermore album by ts wait nbnc by ts what's genre is it

Rossi: what's an nbnc?

Derek: where'd u come from old man? 🤨🤨🤨

Spencer: nbnc is an abbreviation for the song No Body, No Crime by Taylor Swift

Penelope: evermore is indie pop, nbnc is pop/country rock ☺️☺️🫶🫶

Lilly: thx PG <3

Lilly: [replying to: nbnc is an abbreviation for the song No Body, No Crime by Taylor Swift] also, the title has no caps ✌️

Lilly: [replaying to: yeah and shes stunning 🤩] SIMP ALERT 🗣🗣‼️‼️

[Lilly has gone offline]

Emily: she schooled ur ass Reid

Spencer: she called your girlfriend a simp

Emily: idc she is a simp

Derek: wait a min I just realised something

JJ: don't call me a simp. Please? 😅

Derek: no it's not that

Derek: well u are a simp BUT

Derek: anyone notice how this is the first time Lilly's gone to a bar with us and she hasn't been glued to someones side the whole night? 🤔🤔🤔

Emily: she hasn't as well

Emily: why did I just get a sudden burst of pride?

[Lilly is online]

Penelope: Aww. Our little Lilly's all grown up 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

JJ: why does she do that? She's like a clingy two year old sometimes.

Lilly: 🌈✨ trauma ✨🌈

JJ: oh.

Spencer: where's ur bartender gone?

Lilly: okay, 1, she isn't mine she's her own person, 2, her shift finished

Emily: what r u still doing here?

Lilly: wow. Way to make me feel wanted em 🙄🤚

Emily: no, like, uve spent the whole night flirting with her. Her shifts ended, why not...

Lilly: get laid? She's not into girls

Emily: oh...

Lilly: I still have her number tho, so I got myself a new friend 💪💪

Spencer: that sentence made me thing of Lemon Boy by Cavetown

Lilly: I LOVE LEMON BOY!!

Lilly: it reminds me of u tbh

Spencer: really?

Lilly: yeah. The friendship in it makes me think of u and Morgan 😌😌

Derek: now I've gotta listen to this song

Lilly: the best decision ull ever make. Everyone needs to listen to him tbh

Penelope: chocolate thunder come dance w/me!!

Derek: anything for you baby girl 😏❤️

JJ: I'm in!!

Emily: not w/o me

Lilly: Spence? Wanna join?

Spencer: I don't know....

Lilly: as friends 🙂

Spencer: okay