I am a coward. I'm terrified of having someone I care about because it would be so easy for them to break me. I'm terrified because I've never felt this way before, and I don't want to lose you. I know it's selfish, but I don't want to end up loosing you. Wouldn't it be easier for you to lose all romantic interest in me, but I could still have you by my side? I am a coward in the sense that I can not come to terms with the fact that having a crush can be a good thing, but also a terrible thing as well. I have not been able to figure out my feelings, but now that I have I'm terrified. I have no experience, and yet he has so much. God, I wish there was something I could do to figure out how I feel. I know how I feel, but why do I feel like this? What is the appropriate action to follow these feelings? I am doubtful of myself. I know how I can get. I am petty, and I start fights. I push people away all the time and expect them to come back. It's not healthy, and I don't want to taint you. I want to help you be better, because I know you're not perfectly okay, and that's alright. I don't want to be someone's downfall, but I don't want to collapse.
