Pros and Cons

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You know parents sometimes do this thing where they try to make you feel all grown up by making you make your own decisions and stuff? Yeah, that's a shit idea.

I couldn't nap after that. Instead I rolled around anxiously in the boiling room before getting up irritated, and flinging the window open. Instantly the loud honks and chaotic chatter of the world filled the room and I huffed, sitting down on the floor.

Why. Why do my parents put me in these situations?

The plan was to thwart off the marriage topic till I was 30 and then fake some disease so everyone would leave me alone. I could then live happily ever after.

Nazneen walked into the room after a couple minutes of my moping and found me on the floor. She was about to say something but when she saw me, she just closed the door and joined me on the floor.

"Kya hua?"

"The universe hates me," I groaned.

"Why, what happened?"

"Chachi talked to my mom about a rishta. To your damn cousin," I deadpanned.

"What the...." Her eyes went wide. "Are you sure?"

I gave her a look. "Is there another Ali running around here that is your cousin?"

"Oh my God Naz! WE COULD BE SISTERS!" She screamed into my ears. I groaned again and face planted onto the hard floor.

"Get up!" she pulled me off the floor and dragged me to the bed with her. I just face planted into the pillow this time.

"Details!" she wailed.

"There aren't any. My mom just talked to me about him and said to think about it, no pressure," I imitated my mom's voice in annoyance.

"So what'd you say?" she prodded.

"What could I say? You know I can't ever say no to their damn wishes. Frankly I'm more pissed at myself than at them."

"So now what?"

"Now I pretend to consider it till they ask me again and then I give into the pressure and say yes," I huffed.

"Babe," Navsheen sobered up then, realizing what was happening.

This was how it went. My parents expected something from me, wanted something from me and I would sacrifice my own wishes, my own life for their happiness. Most of the time, it was something small, something I could do. But sometimes, once in a while, it was something that forced me to change who I was.

"Let's think this through Naz. Do what you do best. Pros and cons list!" she got up and grabbed her little notebook from her purse and a pen.

She handed it to me and patted my leg. "I'll be back in a bit."

I sighed and looked at the blank page in my hand. I wanted to burn the little book and go on a screaming rampage through the streets.

I just wanted to enjoy my best friend/cousin's wedding. Why this?

I decided to just do what she said. I drew a t-chart, one side pros and the other side cons.

Pros: he came from a good, religious, wealthy family, he himself was in school studying something relatively smart, he was friendly, not bad looking, and seemed to be quite beloved by everyone.

Cons: he was annoying as hell, a little overbearing, a bit too skinny for my taste, and his own faith was unclear to me.

So more pros than cons. But I still wanted a first hand experience.

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