BRIAR'S POV
I have never been this scared of going out how much I am right now while going out with Cayden . He looks confident like always but I don't want anything happening with him .
Its not that we are going alone by ourselves but there are two big and huge bodyguards wearing all black walking around us where ever we move in the mall . I am shocked that no one objected .
Some people looked confused and some looked continuously at us most probably thinking we are mad and some children even got scared that once they saw our bodyguards , a loud scream was heard before continuous crying .
Cayden looks clam and collected , he must have got a habit all these years . The bodyguards only left us alone when we entered in any clothes shop . Cayden literally forced me to buy almost everything I saw or anything he likes . What I didn't liked was the sales girls who behaved like whores when ever Cayden talked to them which was mostly about me .
The only time I felt relaxed was when we entered in the car to drive back home .
Right now we are sitting on the sofa with popcorns in hands and watching Evil Dead which I must say is more interesting than scary .
" why is this girl going out when she knows something is wrong out there? " I asked Cayden .
" I swear the writer of this film wasn't my best friend Briar that I will know out of all things why she will go out that too when she knows there's something wrong ." he answered without looking at me .
We are cuddling together with a blanket over us . It's a pure amazement being in his arms feeling safe and sound . I can believe that this is forever but no one can run from their past and the kind of past which includes lots and lots of troubles . I just want Cayden to hold me this way the whole of my life , but somewhere deeply I know that Cayden deserves to know all about me and my past , but only the problem is his response after he knows all about me . The same old questions continuously comes in my head but there are no answers to any of them .
I watched the movie till the end but Cayden slept in the middle , my head rested on his chest and I swear there's no other comfortable position than this .
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" hey " why is it that while sleeping also I can hear Cayden's husky voice just beside me .
" Briar ." oh there's his voice again . This time I felt his fingers on my chest moving around my skin which sent a shiver all from my body to my toes . I can't believe that this is a dream as it's so real . He placed soft kisses on my neck and I could do nothing but arch my neck for better access . " I know your enjoying this but you need to get up as I will be going to office today ." Office ?? This time I opened my eyes . Okay , so this was not a dream but all real .
His beautiful eyes where the first thing I have seen but there was surely some other emotion in them which confused me . His eyes looked very distant like they were not what Cayden's eyes looks like . They looked extremely unknown . Moving away he stood straight towering over me with wired expression on his face . I noticed he is dressed perfectly for office but out of all days why is he going to office today ? " your going to office ?" I asked . " yeah , you were sleeping so I didn't disturb , I will come back home late so don't wait for me on dinner ." " why ? I mean why will you come late and why didn't you wake me earlier ? " I asked not once taking my eyes off him in order to read his expression . " I have work . You were sleeping so I didn't disturb ." what ?? " then why you woke me now ?" I asked now really confused . " I am getting late Briar , we'll talk later . " placing a soft kiss unlike his expression he moved away towards the door leaving me confused as hell with his wired behavior . I hope he is fine with whatever is happening .
Boring . Very boring . This kind of life is worth not living . The TV is super boring too , I even saw news today but it was repeating the same news again and again so I switched it off . I cleaned almost every corner of the house but I still got lots of time before dinner . Cayden wont come sooner but I can still wait , what if he comes .
At 10 :45 I stopped waiting for Cayden and at last eat some thing and right now its almost 12 but there's no sign of my husband . I hope he is good . I don't have a phone as well so I can't call him . Tomorrow first thing I will ask him is my phone but right now I am too sleepy for waiting anymore for him .
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You know what you did .
You don't deserve Cayden .
He will leave you .
You don't deserve happiness . You killed . You're a killer .
" mom . " I called . " mom these voices are not stopping , help me . You know I didn't killed purposely , tell them to go away . Mom my head hurts ." I said holding my head with my shivering hands . " they are not lying Briar , you're a killer . You don't deserve one bit of happiness . " she said with teary eyes .
" I need you mom ." I begged . " mom I am dying , help me out of this . Mom . " I begged more .
" you're a bitch , you will suffer ." that voice .. was Lilli's . Yes it was hers . She found me .
" l-lilly .." tears where running out of my eyes and my throat hurt . She appeared in front of me with the same face and smile . " I will kill everyone who gives you happiness , like I did with your dad . " she smiled evilly . " n-nno " I pleaded but she never listened . " I will destroy your all happiness , Cayden will hate you . He gives you happiness right ? Well not anymore . He will die ." she came closer and I moved backwards . I cried and pleaded but she never listened and came closer .
"Killed ."
"You will die but not alone , with your Cayden . "
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" no ...please " " ssshhh I am hear see I am with you , Briar its okay ." that warms safe arms are wrapped around me and Lilly is nowhere . Nowhere . I couldn't help but whimper moving closer towards him .
" Cayden ..? "
" yeah " he whispered in my ears while moving his fingers in my hair .
" I-I didn't do anything .. She will k-kill m-me ." I said all that came to my mouth with a mouthful of sobs and whimpers .
" tell me about it ." he asked , will he forgive me for what I have done ? Will he care the same way ? Will he even keep me ? Will he ....??
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~rashk
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