there's a wall around my heart
made of stone
I can feel it
it protects me
but
it also cuts me off
I made the wall
I'm afraid to have people
get close to me
because
I'm afraid of getting hurt
again
afraid they will just turn away
after seeing my heart
and leave me
alone
so I made the wall
the wall is made of stones
each originated as a hurt
a sentence or action
that fossilated
into stone
I am by myself
surrounded by echoes
because I made the wall
I can't break it down
it would leave me
too vulnerable
too open to prying eyes
my heart would have no
protection
so I keep the wall
there's a secret door
through which I can let
people in
but it is hidden
and I guard it very well
to get in
you would have to pass
many tests
so I can be assured
that you won't
break my heart more
not many bother
to go to lengths
to be allowed to pass
through the door
God can reach in to me
because He comes from above
but people don't see
the hurt
the pain
the fear
the doubt
inside
they just see a wall
whenever I venture outside
I have to leave the door open
so I can get back in
and so I am more
vulnerable
and careful
when I am outside of my wall
I don't like the risk
so I mostly stay inside
but I get lonely
sometimes I leave the door open
for a bit
just to see
if anyone wants to come in
they rarely do
even if I invite them
or they just
loiter on the doorstep
usually there's another stone
to add
to the wall around my heart
YOU ARE READING
Jst Random Words
PoetryA collection of words. Pieces of thoughts and feelings. An attempt at the impossible task of putting into words what moves in people's hearts.
