24: Pain

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Seconds. Minutes. Hours. Days. Weeks. They passed.

Life seemed to pass faster than I expected. It early September and the month I found out I have cancer is May. Four months passed so quickly.

Each passing day, I felt more weak. I became less fit for school and ended up having to attend lessons online. Nose bleeds have been frequent. My light brown skin is turning pale, similar to how I've seen Mom during her last few weeks before she left us. My lips are chapped because I seriously don't have any appetite to consume anything, including water, even though Blake will force me to. My brown hair is turning rough and I'm losing some of it now; having a need to wear a hoodie or a beanie when I go out. My fingers looked like a bone, but still manage to be able to carry a mug or something.

I am so tired that I want to rest in bed all day, all week. All of my loved ones are there for me, supporting me all the way. Dad has been surprisingly by my side almost everyday, always popping questions if I feel tired or if I need something. It's been a while since I've enjoyed Dad's company and I'm pretty sure he regretted it because he looked so guilty and apologetic when we talked a few nights ago. But I didn't mind, he's here now.

Asher have been driving me to chemo sessions, along with Blake who's always with me, sometimes with one of the T5M boys and Eyla- Edward and Layla of course. Ash actually wanted to take online classes, to take care of me. But I didn't allow it. I knew how much his sport education mean to him, I couldn't let him give that up just because of me when he has worked so hard for it. His efforts will be gone to waste. He got accepted in USAC recently, one of the universities that he longed for as long as I can remember and I am so proud of him. And I can't forget how happy he is when he read through the letter. That's why I can't let him to give up on his sport in school. He needs to have a future.

I am in love with Blake as usual, so did he. He can practically call my house his home, or his house my other home. We've been sharing a bed almost every night to be by my side, which Dad approved by the way. He's been showering me with kisses and hugs filled with love and longing. We never did anything further than making out. But stops there when it gets too intimating. He knew that he won't pressure and will wait for me to be ready, I am thankful for it. I want him and I need him. And he bluntly show me how much he want me too. And how I wanted my life to be perfect like that.

But now here I am, in the ER with tubes inserted into my nose. Blurred images of people rushing towards me were the last thing I saw before I let the dark completely consume me.

I am unconscious.

4 hours earlier

A soft knock was heard on my bedroom door, I said a 'come in' in response. And there came in, my handsome boyfriend and the rest of the T5M members. I smile warmly at them before looking down at the book I'm reading called " Bullied " on my phone and placed it on my dresser right next to me. Blake sat on bed next to me, wrapping his arms round my waist, pulling myself next to him gently.

" How are you feeling, chipmunk? " Blake lovingly kiss my temple. " I'm okay, just a little tired, that's all. " I replied with a tired smile while leaning against him and enjoying the warmth from his body. Blake looked at his friends that's in my room and nodded to himself.

" Maybe we should come back another day. You should rest, babe. " He said. I shook my head rapidly, Blake looked at me with raise eye brows questioning me. " There's no need. It's been a while since I've seen the guys anyway. " I convince him. He looked like he's having a mental battle with his brain and sighed. I smiled brightly and I noticed how the guys are so stiff and tense in my room.

" You guys can make yourself comfortable in my room, make yourself at home. I won't bite. " I teased them and Blake let out a chuckle. The boys looked at each other and Andy is the first one to shout " I called dibs on Jade's lap. " and jumped onto my bed which surprise me. He lay his head on my right lap and snuggle playfully. Blake growled at him and Andy shrug innocently. He in the end grunted unhappily that Andy is laying on my lap.

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