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Chapter Nine

Summer's POV:

I sat and told the detectives every detail about what had happened to me with Ryan, and the blonde one scribbled it all down in a small notebook, while the one who'd identified herself as Prentiss watched me, and asked the questions. I could tell the Prentiss detective had been doing her job a while, and she was very gentle and kind to me, but it ended up making me feel worse. All I wanted was to go home, but I didn't really even know what home was anymore. My apartment with Ryan may not have really been home, considering I hated every moment I was there, but still it was familiar. It was some idea of home at least, but now I would never ever feel safe going back there. Being with Gaga, snugged up with her in her apartment always felt so safe, but I was scared to let it feel like home, because I knew it probably wouldn't last, especially not now. There's no way Gaga would still want to be with me now. Prentiss could tell I was zoning out, and set her hand gently on my arm. "Are you okay?" She asked softly. I nodded, clearing my head of all those thoughts, and went back to answering the questions.

It was a good hour before I was done being questioned, and Prentiss gave me her card and told me to call if I remembered or needed anything else. She informed me she'd be the main person working my case, and that she wanted to be accessible to me if ever needed. Which I appreciated. She handed me another card of a victim crisis counselor, but the second she turned her back to me, I crumpled it and threw it on the floor. A few minutes later Tara peeked her head through the door, looking at me with a face full of different emotions. "Hi Tar." I said, my voice cracking part way through. "Hi babydoll." She whispered, fully entering the room. Her use of the word "baby" made my stomach flip as it sent me back into thoughts of Ryan, but the "doll" after it made me smile, since that's what she used to always call me when we'd message on Instagram. "How are you feeling?" She asked, pulling me out of my thoughts. "Well... Kinda like I got hit by a bus." I replied with a small forced laugh, causing her to look down. "Sorry, that was probably a dumb question." I shook my head, "It's okay. Joking about the shit I go through is kind of the only way I know how to deal." She let out her own small laugh, and came and sat next to me. "Where's Gaga?" I asked, looking back at the door. I'd honestly expected her to come busting in the moment the detectives were gone, but there was no sign of her. "She went to get you something to eat. She said you needed something better than hospital food. Honestly I think she just needed something to do to keep herself occupied while you were in here." I nodded in understanding. "I really wish I wasn't putting her through this." I mumbled partially under my breath. "What in the world do you mean?" Tara asked. I sighed, and looked down at the sheet that was covering only one of my legs. "I just... This is a lot. This is so much and she is so determined to help me through it but... It's a lot. There's no way she'll actually want to stay with me after it." Tara stood up and looked at me as if I was stupid. "Doll, that woman loves you. With all her heart. You are the love of her life, I can tell. There's no way she's leaving you, and she does not mind being here for you through this. She would do anything for you. Not to mention she's not alone. You have me too." I smiled a little, "You've always been too good to me." She shook her head. "You are so special. I've always known that. Talking to you always made me happy, and I'm beyond thrilled that you're in my life like this now. Quit trying to push us away in your mind with those false thoughts. We are here for you, and we are not going anywhere." I nodded to what she said, but I still had doubt in my mind. Before I could respond, though, there was a light knock on the door. "I brought sub sandwiches." Gaga said, walking in and holding up the bag that was in her hand. I smiled at her warmly, and watched as she pulled the tray over to me, and got my sandwich out and unwrapped. "Thank you, Stef." I said, and she kissed my head in return. The three of us sat and ate while making light conversation, but I could tell Gaga wanted to push more about what had happened. Before she got the chance to a nurse came in with multiple little cups of pills. She set them down on my tray, and started checking my blood pressure, and fluid levels, and whatever else she was supposed to check. Once she'd finished she turned back to me. "We tested for any possible STD's, and they did come back negative, but you will need to come back every 6 weeks for the next few months, just to ensure you are in fact clear. Here are some antibiotics, and other meds that could help to prevent it, or any other thing you could have picked up." She handed me a couple cups, and a jug of water. The next few she handed me were some pain killers, and anti-inflammatorys to help with any of the injuries. "Alright, and lastly this one is a Plan B tablet. It is totally your decision to take it. I know some people don't want it for religious purposes, but most women in this situation do take it as they don't want the risk for pregnancy." All at once all sound became distant as I stared at the little pink pill she was handing me. For some reason so many things became real in that moment, and I panicked a bit. I put the pill under my tongue, and swallowed it without hesitation, and the nurse left having fulfilled her duties. As I sat there, Gaga and Tara both tried to talk to me, but I couldn't focus enough to make their words out. I started to hyperventilate, and I saw Gaga stand up, and walk over to me. "Summer, babe. Are you okay?" I shook my head, but wasn't able to get any words out. She watched me for a moment, unsure of what the best thing was to do. Eventually she wrapped her arms around me tightly, and whispered to breathe. She breathed with me, and helped me slow it down while whispering light positive things into my ear, until I was able to get my breathing down to a somewhat normal speed. And there, wrapped in her arms, I finally found it. The feeling I'd been searching for. Home.