I'm only the Server Boy

14

Tuesday nights air was extremely cool due to how much it had rained over the last 3 days. Chase actually thought that there was so much rain that it could flood the city. Chase was watching the video again, sighing. Was his decision really the best choice? Maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was.

He just knew he had to do this. It would break Nate's heart but he had too. He needed this to keep himself sane. And it wasn't like he was leaving and never coming back.... he'd be back...he just wasn't sure when...

He also felt bad for not talking to Nate on Monday like he promised...

The door slid open, but Chase paid no attention to it, only looked over the city skyline. It probably was either Haven or Annie coming out to check on him or leave him some food.

Haven knew about Chases decision and she was 100% behind it. She always wanted what was best for him and if chase thought this was best, then she'd back him up. She also knew this would be a good way to take the mental break he needed and get some closure.

The person sat down in the chair next to him, not saying a word. Seconds turned into minutes before the person finally said something.

"Can we-"

Chase was out of his chair and drapped over the mans chest as soon as he recognized his voice.

Nate wrapped his arms tightly around Chase, afraid to let go... like he would turn to ash or he would wake up and this would all be some sick and twisted dream. Chase had made his decision about how to handle this. And he knew it was the right one.

No words where exchanged between the two as they held onto each other tightly, one afraid of the response he was to get, and the other afraid of the reaction.

Would Nate leave him for this?

Chase finally let go of Nate, but stayed in his lap. He ran his hands up Nate's hoodie covered chest before letting them rest on his shoulders. "Can we talk now?" Nate whispered quietly.
Chase frowned, but nodded.
Nate bit his lip, the look on Chases face not giving him good vibes.

Chase gripped Nate's hoodie. "What did you decide?" Nate asked quietly. Chase shook his head tears in his eyes.
"I don't want to break up with you."

Nate's heart skipped a beat as the word left Chase's mouth. The relief he was feeling was the best... "but I need some space..."

All the relief Nate had felt was smacked right out of him. He tightened his grip on Chases hips. Neither boys said anything for a moment until Chase broke the silence. "I... I'm going on a trip for a bit... I'm going to try and find my mom... and if I'm lucky my dad..." Chase mumbled. "I'll I've ever known is here in L.A.... I need to explore a little. Find myself." Chase whispered, looking at his name engraved on the silver plate and fastened on Nate's wrist. He brushed his fingers over his name before intertwining there fingers. He glanced up at Nate, searching for a reaction.

"You're going by yourself?" Nate asked. Chase nodded. "How long will you be gone? And how are you even going to get there?"
"I'm not sure... a month. Maybe two or three. And Havens letting me use her old car."
Nate nodded, brushing his thumb over Chase's knuckles into Chases hips. "When are you leaving?"
"Tomorrow night."
"Where do you plan on going?"

"I know she's from Italy and her parents... my grandparents, immigrated over to America and lives in New York, and if I'm right my grandparents still live there, so I'm going to head there and see what they know... if they don't, I'm headed to Vermont, where my uncle lives. He knows what's going on with everyone all the time. I talked to him yesterday. He said he can figure it out if I can't get it from my grandparents."

Nate bit his lip. "And your trusting all this?"
"I don't have any other options. I've wanted to do this but never had the time... mows the time."
"What about Classes? And graduation?"
"I'm finishing my main courses online and ill have to pick up my diploma when I get back."

Nate frowned

Silence again.

"And I can't change your mind?" Nate asked.
"No..." Chase sighed.
"Then... ill be here when you get back..." Nate mumbled with watery in his eyes. Chase smiled, tears running down his face. He nodded before laying down in Nate's chest, getting as comfy as he could. Nate held Chase to his chest, looking out the balcony. There was no way he'd be able to change Chase's mind about leaving. But he'll wait for him to get back... Even if it takes months...

"I love you...."

"I love you too Nate."

••••••••

My heart hurts but it's fine. (No it's not...)
That's the end guys...
No more..
I'm actually crying....
I probably won't put an epilogue. I'm not sure yet....
I was thinking about making a book for Chase, just all about his travels and trying to find his parents while still keeping in touch with Nate... would you guys read that?

In other news though...

CHARLIES GETTING HIS OWN BOOK!!!!!!!

It'll be all about his struggles of being a parent and determining his sexuality... and you'll get some unseen stuff that I didn't include in this book... I'm going to try and put that chapter out tomorrow, but I'm very busy so no promises...

Thank you for the reads, and the votes and the comments, they make me smile so much :)
Hopefully I'll see you In Charlie's book, (and Chases if I make one!)

All the love

kj xx