The Royal Romances

The Betrayal

Suffolk, East Anglia
September 1421

The sun is shining but I can see the heavy, black clouds gathering in the horizon and soon the rain will be on our doorstep. From my chair in the shade I have the view of our garden, which is still in full bloom, and the fields that stretch out as far as the eye can see. I put down my copy of my latest book on astronomy, a subject that now fascinates, me and take a deep breath.

"Time to go inside Richard."

The boy's black hair is nearly invisible as he's standing on his knees in the tall grass, playing his own version of hide and seek with the dog. He is tall for his age and still growing both taller and bigger each day. Just in the last few months, I have noticed a change in him in the way he acts and speaks to me. I can tell in his eyes that he's hiding things from me, even if they are only minor details which in fact do not matter. He no longer needs me the way he'd used to and starts to become his own person. I can already detect a strength in him which makes me hopeful.

"Please mama, a little longer", he yells as he runs in a circle with the mutt at his tail.

I do not have the heart to tell him no, not as long as the sun is beaming. My husband's footsteps are approaching and after squeezing my shoulder, he runs as fast as his ageing legs will allow him. As he starts to run after Richard and the boy screams with excitement, I close my eyes and think that at least for a while longer, Richard is still a boy. I stretch out my legs and feel how truly tiring the heat is. Even though the summer is at an end, the breeze is warm on my cheeks and I can wear my summer gowns without getting a chill. I have nearly drifted off into sleep when Richard's scream makes me jump out of my chair.

"Papa, papa!" he yells over and over and I realise I can only see him.

My husband is laying on the ground with his hand on his chest, his face twisted in pain, when I reach him.

"Help me somebody!" I scream as I get down on my knees.

I try to get my husband on his feet but he cannot help and his weight is too much for me to carry. Richard's sobbing loudly and the dog's barking whilst running around in a circle.
Someone comes rushing out from the house and when they come closer I see that it's our cook Thomas and his wife Margaret. With his help, we quickly get my husband on his feet and with my heart pounding in my ears, we can finally put him down on our bed.

"Take Richard to his chambers and send someone for the physician and be quick about it", I command Margaret in a brutal voice.

When the room is empty all I can hear is the sound of my own heavy breathing and the sounds of my husband's muffled cries of pain. I go to his side and take his hand in mine.

"What can I do husband?" I ask desperately. "Please tell me what to do."

After a while he's finally able to whisper:

"Water", under his breath.

When I'm back with the cup it already looks like he's in less pain and the sick feeling in my stomach starts to settle down. As he finishes the water I pour down his throat, he watches me closely and after he swallows the last mouthful, he is the one who takes my hand.

"Stay", he says, his voice a little bit stronger.

I smile and sit down on the side of the bed. I look at my husband and grasp how little colour he has left in his face.

"Forgive me Emily."

"What for husband?"

"Everything. I know I was..brutal."

The months before Richard is born are extremely lonely. I'm not allowed any visitors and I cannot write any letters which did not go through my husband, who didn't speak to me except through the servants. I would probably have gone mad if I did not put all my focus on the child growing bigger in my belly and prayer. At least my husband was never able to take God's comfort away from me. Finally on a cold, rainy night in December, my baby boy is born after fourteen hours of agony. My body recovers rather quickly, my baby is healthy and I feel happy, even though I more than anything wish that Edmund could see our boy. When Richard's a week old my husband suddenly leaves the solitude of his study and barges into the nursery.