Like He Never Left

chapter 30

Colt's POV

"Please, Amanda, don't make me go over it again," I plead, throwing a pillow over my face in frustration. 

"I just don't understand," she says dumbfoundedly. "I know Brooke. Sweet Brooke. Nice Brooke. Kid doctor Brooke. And she ends up being a monster Brooke? I just don't understand."

Yeah. Me neither. 

Tossing the pillow to the floor, I sit up and face Amanda once more on my laptop screen and throw my hands up in exasperation. "Tell me about it."

Her gaze softens, and she reaches out to touch her screen. "It'll be okay, buddy, I promise you."

I cast my eyes down, so humiliated that I didn't see what was going on right underneath my nose. "I know."

Johnny, who's laying down pressed against my side, perches his head on my thigh, his droopy eyes staring up at me. I ruffle the fur between his ears and swallow thickly. 

I bet this is my karma. What goes around comes around. 

"Does anybody down there know what happened?"

I shake my head. 

"Are they ever going to?"

I nod. "Eventually." Johnny breaks our gaze, and I return mine to Amanda. "I just need to figure out what I'm going to do with myself, ya know? I want to have a plan first."

Amanda cracks a smile. "Sounds like a plan, Stan."

I snort through my nose. "Yeah, I guess so."

"So..." she trails, "What are you going to do? Are you going to stay in Georgia for the time being, for forever? What's going to happen?"

What's going to happen? I've been asking myself that for a bit longer than I'd care to admit. 

I can't stay here forever, I mean I do have a life that I created in Boston. I can't just... abandon it. 

Realization dawns on me and I look to Amanda with wide eyes. 

"I'm not going to make the same mistake twice, I'll tell you that right now. Listen Amanda, it's been an enlightening experience with you, as always. But I've got to go," I say hurriedly, bouncing off the bed. 

"Good luck!" she calls, just before the screen goes dark. 

I close my laptop and get dressed quickly. 

My feet thunder down the stairs as Dad tosses me my car keys, hollering, "Don't know where you're going but don't be stupid!" after me. If I wasn't in so much of a rush, I'd laugh. 

Jamming the keys into his truck, I peel out of the driveway and speed to Josie's house. 

The five minutes it takes to get there feels like five eons, and somehow every traffic light senses my anticipation and turns a blazing red. 

Finally, finally I manage to swing into her drive after making sure that James's truck isn't anywhere to be seen. Not that I'm trying to go behind his back, but this would be a helluva lot easier if he were somewhere else.

Before I know it, I find myself on the front porch, totally debating my life decisions.

But I'm cold so I knock anyways. 

The door opens seconds later to show a hopeful, exuberant Josie.

"James did you change your... oh." Her eyes dull and her body sags when she realizes it's me like she'd just realized the vending machine was sold out of her favorite candy, but I ignore the punch to the gut anyways. "Oh, uh, Colt. I wasn't expecting you." She glances behind me, scanning the horizon before focusing—and I use that term loosely—on me.