if we survive

t h i r t y

a s h

I couldn't see, hear, move, or speak, but I was there. I was stuck in my head, I could think but I couldn't speak, I could feel but I couldn't move. I felt my brother's arms holding me back from whatever I'd been trying to do, I felt the second dose of the cure being poured onto my arm. It was like clarity burned through me within an instant. I felt myself becoming myself again, my hearing came back, and cries filled my ears, my sense of smell returned and all I could smell was blood, and I could move. I opened my eyes and saw everyone, everything, I saw Adrian. Adrian with the hole in his head. As soon as the realization hit my legs gave out but Holden's arms held me up but I still cried and I screamed. Holden let go of me as soon as the sound left my mouth but I fell onto him causing him to fall back too. I fell on all fours coughing up the black blood that was being pushed desperately out of my veins. I felt a hand on my back but I heaved up as much black blood as I could before dropped onto the cot beside me where I was still handcuffed to the wall beside.

"Unlock the handcuffs, I think he's okay." My brother said moving to my side and pushing the strands of my hair that was drowned in sweat out of my eyes. I could feel the black blood dripping from my mouth, even if I wasn't a lurker I still looked like one. When the handcuff was off of my wrist I finally opened my eyes and looked to my left where Adrian lay with Adam silently staring at him. I moved to Adam's side. He glanced my way towards the corner of his eye then attacked me in a bear hug that I had no way of getting out of. He cried. I'd never seen Adam cry but I couldn't blame him for breaking down in my arms. His brother is dead and the bullet through his brain meant he wasn't coming back.

"You're okay Adam, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I whispered but Adam didn't reply. He sniffed and pulled away wiping his eyes, turning back to his brother.

"You're okay now so we need to go, Adrian deserves a funeral immediately." He mumbled and turned to glare straight at Benji. "You deserve one too." Benji's eyes widened and backed away, I got ready to hold Adam back but he didn't attack.

"What happened to him, who did it?" I asked. I knew who it was, but I wanted to hear it. I wanted to know for sure.

"Your asshole doctor tried to put a bullet through your head but Adrian stepped in." Adam mumbled and stood to his feet. "The only person here that deserved to die tonight was your brother, apparently fate chose differently." Adam grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards Colman and Ethan, he let go of me and grabbed Ethan so he could help carry Adrian's body. I turned to Colman, she didn't think twice before wrapping her arms around my neck and crying like Adam had. Something was different about this hug with Colman, because when she cried I started to silently tear up myself. Reality of everything came crashing down and it was hard to ignore it. I tightened my hold around her waist until she was all out of tears. I pulled away without a word looking at her with the kindest expression I could work up.

"Why did you do it?" She whispered.

"I had to, there wasn't any other way to get you out without a fight." I said and looked dead in her eyes. "I'm okay. The cure works, if I hadn't of let myself get bit then we would never know if we could end the apocalypse."

"Lurkers aren't the reason for the apocalypse Ashton." Colman said. "The apocalypse is only beginning, even with the cure."

I didn't understand what she was talking about at first so I stayed quiet. But, when the bearded guy from the cabin we'd been held hostage in only hours before barged into medical I realized exactly what she meant. Humans are the reason the world is how it is, sure the disease had something to do with it but humans handled the situation wrong and the consequences lead to the end of the world.

"Anon, it's not what you think." Holden said as soon as he realized the bearded guy was inside. I pulled Colman behind me and moved to Adam and Ethan's side.

"I don't care what it looks like, explain to me why there's a dead kid inside of the medical cabin and why your brother isn't locked up." Anon cocked his head to glare daggers at Holden.

"No, I'm not dealing with this shit." I heard Adam mumbled behind me. He grabbed his shotgun from the floor beside Adrian and aimed it directly against Anon's chest. He didn't pull the trigger, he waited for Anon to make the first move. This was the Adam I knew, the Adam that didn't care about killing a cruel human. Even if Anon didn't make the first move, Adam still wouldn't let him leave without a bullet taking his life. I put my hand on Adam's wrist, signaling for him to wait. He nodded without looking my way and I approached Anon.

"You kidnapped my brother, you tried to get him to murder my best friend, you made him become the antagonist, you deserve death just as much as he does and if you think for a second we aren't going to end your life you've got another thing coming." I glared daggers at this man but he remained calm. There was nothing in his eyes, no traceable emotion.

"I came here to tell Benji that he's needed at the school tent, Zac had an accident." Anon said to Holden, not even giving me another glance. My heart dropped, I'd completely forgotten about the kids. I hadn't seen any of them in months and they probably still thought I was dead. Poor Zac, I was his idol and he thought I was dead.

"What happened? Is he alright?" I asked, moving back behind Adam who still held his gun aimed at Anon.

"He sprained his ankle playing tag with some other kids, it's not a big deal." Anon said and looked at Benji. "Are you going to go check on him or not? I mean, that is why you're at this camp isn't it?"

Adam cocked his gun bringing everyone's attention back on him. "Just because you aren't reacting or running away doesn't mean I'm going to feel guilty after shooting you."

"If you're so set on killing me then why haven't you pulled the trigger yet? What are you waiting for?" Anon walked towards us until the barrel of Adam's shotgun was pressed against his chest. Adam glared daggers at the man in front of us. Ethan held Colman behind him and tried to pull me back too but I stayed by Adam's side. Benji was sulking in the corner while Holden watched Anon dangerously.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to take my prisoners back to my cabin." Anon said after a long five minutes of silence and glared. Anon grabbed my wrist trying to tug me forward but I grabbed Adam hand to help me stand my ground. Adam glanced at me, I could see the muscles in his hands tense up as he slowly put pressure on the trigger. When Anon tugged me forward, the bullet exploded his chest from the close range. He stumbled back, a look of pure shock stuck in his face and fell to the ground, dead. Adam dropped the gun and turned to me. Anon's blood was splattered all over his face and shirt.

"He deserved it, I'm not supposed to feel guilty." Adam whispered, I was the only person in the room that could hear him.

"He deserved it." I nodded and dropped my hand onto Adam's shoulder. "He deserved it."