Mess To Be Made

17

I always loved Christmas. I loved the lights. The brightness. The bringing of people together. That's what I loved most. Even from a young age, I loved how this one holiday somehow brought us all together. And this year was no different.

Both my dad and Aaron came home for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. The two men in our house who never came home. They came home for Christmas.

"Al Pal!" Aaron yelled as he got out of Mom's car after she picked him up from the airport the day before Christmas Eve. I hadn't seen him since he left for his second year at Boston College in August.

We looked almost identical, but we were never particularly close, even being only two years apart. I was always the more outgoing one. I was more popular than him as a sophomore than he was as a senior. He was always the smart, practical one. And when my reputation became what it was—what it is—it was clear he was embarrassed by me. I can't blame him. I can only imagine the things he heard.

College did wonders for him. It was his escape. His fresh start. He was Aaron Carson there—not Allie's older brother. So it was no surprise that he rarely came home. He blamed it on the price of cross-country flights, but deep-down we all knew that was an excuse.

Still, I loved my brother. I often wished things had been different for a lot of reasons—a large one, though, was my relationship with Aaron.

"Mac-Aaron-i!" I yelled with a laugh as I ran out the front door to meet him in the driveway, pulling him into a hug that almost suffocated him. I murmured, "I missed you."

He let out a breath of air and relaxed into my arms, making me smile. "I missed you too, Al."

That night, Aaron and I went over to Sean's. Steven was there and we played beer pong against each other. Just like old times, when Sean and I were Sophomores and Aaron and Steven were Seniors. We'd have nights like this. Just us four.

Naturally, Aaron and I won beer pong.

"You sure you're on the basketball team, Sean?" Aaron teased.

"You had an unfair advantage on your team," Sean said and winked at me.

After that, Aaron and I sat on Sean's couch for hours, catching up while Sean and Steven played video games together.

Aaron loved Boston College. He was majoring in History, still set on his plan to go to law school. He had an apartment with his two best friends who he met in his dorm freshman year. He commented on how his grades had slipped a bit this semester—from A's to B's, cue eye roll—because he was partying more.

"Nothing wrong with partying," I said with a smirk on my lips as I took a large gulp of my beer.

"Yeah," Aaron said on a laugh. "Well, this was my party semester. Now I got to get back to work."

I let out a chuckle through my nose. If only I was that disciplined. "I'm sure you'll be fine."

He smiled lightly and then asked, "So how are you? Really."

I shrugged. "I mean, I'm fine. My grades came out okay. I have good friends. I can't complain."

"I heard you were on Homecoming Court," he said with a smile. "Congrats."

I rolled my eyes, glancing at Sean, who was oblivious to us as he focused on the video game. He was the only person who could've told Aaron. Maybe Mom, but her and Aaron didn't talk that much. "Yeah, well I was the joke vote. But thanks."

Aaron was silent. He knew exactly what I was talking about. There was always a joke vote. And this year, it was his little sister.

"Sorry. Sean didn't—I mean, I'm sure you weren't—"