Hand in hand ; 𝐋𝐞𝐚𝐡 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐦𝐬𝐨𝐧

Chapter 13 ❥

As soon as I got home i got into bed and let myself breakdown, it was my fault me and Leah had the argument but I didn't mean to act like I was ignoring her or hiding are relationship I just didn't want us to end up how me and alexia did

Me and alexia were never really together but we didn't hide are affection for each which lead to speculation and sometimes ridicule which sometimes distanced us and I was afraid that people would distance me and Leah but in me being afraid it caused the one thing I didn't want to happen

Leah hadn't called and I can't say I was expecting her too but it still hurt I really hoped this hadn't ruined things between us, with how much I was overthinking I hadn't realised my eyes were closing and I was drifting into sleep

I woke up feeling confused I hadn't remembered falling asleep my eyes felt heavy and burned from how much I'd been crying, I peeled my bedsheets off my body and walked into my bathroom my eyes were puffy and red and there was lines of dried mascara on my cheeks

I splashed some cold water on my face before leaving the bathroom, I checked the time to see it was only 1 am so I grabbed my phone and walked into my kitchen, I opened the fridge and was only going to have some water but when I saw the near enough full bottle of white wine I stupidly decided to fill my entire glass with it and drank the whole thing

I lazily pushed the now empty cup back onto the counter, I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and stumbled back into my bedroom, i flopped onto my bed and shoved my head in my pillow

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I had woken up for the second time but this time my Room was fully lit with the natural morning light, I got out of my bed and walked to my window to see that it looked a lot later than the usual 8:45 i woke up at.

I grabbed my phone hurriedly to see the time was 11:38 I was beyond late to practice so much so there was no real point in me even going, I had 12 missed calls 4 from Katie, 3 from my mum and 5 from Leah I groaned in annoyance But I wasn't concerned about them right now I felt awful my head was pounding and I felt unbearably nauseous so I just got back into bed and pulled the covers over my head

I wasn't tired anymore the last thing on my mind was sleeping, but I was still exhausted I could tell my sickness was due to my excessive wine consumption and I desperately needed some sort of pain relief but i couldn't get up I couldn't leave my apartment

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I spent the majority of my day going between staring at the ceiling and scrolling through my phone I declined all the calls that had come through and I know I shouldn't but I just needed a day to relax my body and my brain,

I couldn't cry anymore I physically couldn't but the thought of going to practice tomorrow and seeing Leah made my stomach churn, my nerves were spiked but we had one of the most important matches coming up so I couldn't just run away from my problems I needed to speak to Leah eventually but I couldn't bring myself to call

As I decided to get out of bed and make myself something to eat which I hadn't done all day I heard a knock at my door

"Shit" I whispered, I looked a mess all I had on was a pair of shorts and a tank top, I hurriedly ran to my room and threw on a hoodie and grabbed a hair tie throwing my hair into messy bun

I went to my door to Look out of the peep hole but I couldn't quite make out who it was, I prayed it wasn't my mum she would kill me if she saw me like this

I pulled open the door to see someone I definitely was not expecting, the blonde was stood at my door with a bouquet of pink roses and a sorry smile on her face but her smile quickly faltered when she saw my appearance

I folded my arms around my chest tightly and stepped aside for her to come in, my apartment wasn't particularly messy so on the outside the only indication I was having a mental breakdown was by looking at me or the yet to be discarded empty bottle of wine on my counter that I wasn't hoping Leah didn't notice

Leah sat on my couch and placed the flowers on the coffee table

"You didn't answer my calls" was the first Leah said

"I haven't answered anyone's calls" I replied

"I know but everyone was worried and you know, I guess I'm the reason your like this so I just thought you would answer my call" she said looking down and playing with her hands

"Your not the reason im like this Leah, im the reason that im like this you had reasons to be mad at me it's just I don't want you to think that I was purposefully ignoring you" I said going to sit next to her

"Yea I know and thinking about it I didn't let you explain and I shouldn't of said about the ex thing and I just wanted to say sorry" Leah said sincerely

My chest tightened at the mention of 'the ex thing' I didn't know how to respond it felt like If I opened my mouth to speak I would start crying all over again and I didn't want that to happen so I just stayed quiet

"Are you ok" Leah said genuinely once she realised I wasn't talking

I laughed at the comment, my eyes were red and puffy and I was sure there was still mascara smudged on my face

"Yea I'm great" I joked looking at the girl

Leah really took in my appearance and sighed

"If you want to stop seeing each other I get it just-"

"No no that's not what I want that's the opposite of what I want" I cut Leah off before she could continue

We both sat there in silence for a minute or two it wasn't awkward but we were both trying to figure out what to say

"So are we good" Leah said looking at me

"We're good" I nodded

"Are you coming to practice tomorrow"

"I sort of don't have a choice we have a match coming up an important one in that"

"Well your not wrong but I also don't fully believe that you won't put it off for another day so I'll pick you up tomorrow" Leah said

"No Leah it's fine I will go to practice"

"No I insist I'll pick you up at 9:30 and after practice we can go on a date" Leah said, I could tell she was holding her breath waiting for a reply, it was kinda cute when Leah tried to be bold it wasn't her strong suit

"And we can forget this ever happened" I said hesitantly

"And we can forget this every happened" she replied