Shattered

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I don't like this.

I don't like- I hate this.

But then again, since when have I ever liked anything that's happened recently? I let out a deep sigh and shakily reached out for the door handle. It'd only been about a day since me and Sensei's little talk, but I could still feel the dread and heaviness in my chest from just thinking about anything I was about to do.

It was early morning. Sakura had the day off today and she had the whole day free with no plans, apparently. Admittedly I hadn't seen Sakura in about a month so it only made my heart heavier than it already was.

I stepped into the house, shoulders tense as if ready to be attacked. I walked in and closed the door behind me. I'd done my best not to come back to this house for a while, only briefly dropping in here and there and I didn't really spend much to any time here anymore. I didn't like the eerie feeling that always ate away at me. As if my parent's ghosts were watching me and blaming me for their deaths. I sucked in a breath when I heard loud footsteps running down the stairs. 

"Ayame-nee!" Sakura cheered the second she came into view. "You're back! Gosh, I missed you so much!"

My hands and lips trembled and my heart squeezed. 

She looked so happy. Grinning widely and eyes shining with brightness and happiness to see me again. I don't- I...

I managed a shaky at her. "Hi...Sakura," I greeted her weakly.

She immediately frowned, knowing something was off. "Ayame-nee...is something wrong?" She asked, looking at me with concern. 

"...Sakura," I breathed out slowly, not meeting her eyes. If I had to do this I'm not going to watch as the pain sinks in. "I need to...I need to tell you something." I said quietly. 

"Sure. What is it?" She asked, trying to look me in the eyes. 

"U-uh...h-how about I show you instead?" I asked suddenly feeling all my confidence leave me.

"Sure. I don't mind. Whatever you're comfortable with." I'm not comfortable with any of this. Slowly, I reached out and touched her arm. Sakura braced herself before I teleported both of us to the cemetery. Sakura blinked, looking around in confusion. I didn't look at her, just walking inside. I could feel her follow after me as I weaved through the gravestones. "Ayame-nee? What are we doing here? Are we going to pay our respects to someone?" She asked. 

"...Something like that," I muttered quietly, though I knew she heard me because he hummed in response. I could feel my heartbeat speed up the closer we got to their graves. I stopped momentarily, Sakura stopping behind me. I really hoped she couldn't hear my rigid shaky breaths. 

"Here?" She asked. 

After a moment, I continued walking, Sakura hurriedly following behind me.

There they were.

Mother and Father's graves. Their names and date of birth and death are both neatly engraved into the headstones. I stopped in front of them, my hands trembling.

Sakura made a confused sound behind me before moving to my side. "Is this the one-" She cut herself off as her eyes widened at the names. I wasn't even looking at her and I could hear her heart speeding up. "A-Ayame-n-nee...w-why are M-mum and dad's n-names...?" She looked at me. I didn't look at her, keeping my eyes trained on the headstones. I couldn't look at her.

"No..." She whispered, her voice cracking. "No, no, no, no, no nononnononono!!!" She cried out, dropping to her knees.

I clenched my fists, digging my nails into my palms till I could feel my hands start to bleed. I took another deep breath and tried my best to ignore Sakura's sobs but it was hard. I couldn't just ignore her, no matter how hard I tried. It's- I-

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