Fortress Vader

Sixteen - Ardor

If you're gonna be two-faced, at least make one of them dress as a stormtrooper.
Year 5

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Kat

"You did well, Commander."

I don't respond as I strap in, feeling like my energy was siphoned out the moment I boarded the shuttle. He gets the hint and doesn't press me.

I think I might miss the stormtrooper though. He made the trip bearable with his constant presence, even if he never spoke a word.

A minute or so in, I feel him looking at me. Thankfully when he speaks up, it isn't about the Destroyer or the Empire or Vader.

"Where are you from?"

I almost say Mustafar, but realize he would think I'm being sarcastic.

"Chandrila."

"I've been there. It's peaceful."

"My mother died there. I'm not sure I would feel peace going back."

He stays silent, so I take a deep, slow breath. "I'm sorry. I don't normally blurt out sad facts about me."

He chuckles lightly. "I don't mind. But you make it sound like there are more sad facts."

I let myself smile a bit, watching the planet loom closer. I don't remember if I was near a viewscreen the first time I came to Mustafar, but my guess is I wasn't. I would have remembered seeing this sight in person. As violent as it is hot, it's just as beautiful. At least from here, still far above the clouds, where red is the dominant color, swirling with blacks and greys.

"One or two, I guess. I stopped labeling the emotions sometime in my teens."

This planet screams Darth Vader. Maybe it's my own biases, or maybe the planet is shaping Vader.

"How do you know if you're happy or sad?"

"I don't think I get sad," I shrug. If I do, surely I'd be a depressed mess in my position, with everything I've dealt with. Instead, I've embraced it. The little presents I find every once in a while, my crew, even Yellow Eyes brings me joy sometimes. I like watching the lava, I even like the palace. Sometimes I go to the first floor and walk around it, looking at the dark artwork and feeling the way some spots feel cold and some seem void of anything at all, even emotions. I know by now the palace is seeped with dark energy, but I don't feel the Force. It's nothing but a spooky castle to me. It does not make me sad.

"Everyone gets sad." I mean, I've been sad before. Just...not in a while. A long while. Lonely, perhaps.

"Maybe," I smirk. "Do you think Lord Vader gets sad?"

"Probably. If he's even human."

"He's human."

"You've seen him?" The skepticism is thick in his modulated voice.

"No, but I know he's human. I know he's a he. And I know his hand isn't real. His right." The one that holds his lightsaber.

"That's oddly specific," he mumbles.

I shrug. "I don't really know why I know it. I'm fairly sure Yell—," I pause and sigh. "I think his apprentice's hand is too. Must be a hazard of playing with lightsabers."

He laughs, a carefree sound that makes me relax into my chair even though he is landing. I didn't mean it as a joke but can see the humor.

When I don't laugh though, he seems to eye me. He doesn't speak until the ship stops. "Maybe you don't feel humor either," he teases. "You need to get laid."