Yours [Prim/Cato]

Chapter 24 - Victor

It's been two days since Cato has been gone, but it feels like it's been a lifetime. At first, I thought it was a sick dream, because as I was being pulled into a hovercraft, I closed my eyes and slept. When I woke up, I was connected to a hospital bed with needles stuck into my arms.

If wasn't a dream.. and he was still gone.

I haven't spoken a word since I 'won' the Games, not to Haymitch, not to Cinna, and especially not to Effie. There was so much pain, and so much numbness.

But still so much pain.

I felt like I couldn't function without him. I wasn't me anymore.

Right now, I was laying on my bed in the Capitol room, curled up in fetal position with my knees hugged to my chest. I cried all day long, no stopping at all. Today was the Victor's interview with Caesar, but I wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone..

I only wanted to talk to him.

I dreamt about his death everytime I managed to cry myself to sleep, and it only made 'grieving' even worse.

Everyone was calling me the 'victor', or the 'winner', but I didn't feel like one. I felt like I had lost everything I could ever want.

I heard someone open my door, but I didn't get up and I definitely didn't stop crying. People came in everyday trying to get me to talk, to eat, to move at all, but it was always a lost cause. I knew that I had to get up today though. I had to put on the show.

The bed moved, and I knew someone was sitting next to me. A hand started rubbing my back, and for a second, I imagined it was Cato.

But again.. it wasn't who I wanted.. who I'm hopelessly in love with..

The only girl he ever loved echoed through my mind over and over. I regretted not telling him that I loved him because now I would never get the chance to. I realized I was in love, but I would never be in love again.. because everyday would only be about him. I didn't know until now.

"Prim," Cinna's soft voice spoke up. "Come on, it's time to get ready for the interview," he said, pulling me up to hold me in his arms.

I shook my head, hiding my face into my arms as silent tears fell down my face.

"Please, honey, let me take care of you," he pleaded.

Rue is gone, Rose. Just let me take care of you, like I did in the elevator. Remember?

Yes, Cato.. I remember. I always will.

Let Cinna take care of you, baby.

I nodded my head at Cato. He told me he would always be in my heart, and of course, I believed him.

"Okay, Cato," I whispered with a nod.

I sat up and wiped my teary eyes, pushing myself off of Cinna. I watched as Cinna smiled at me as I finally stood up on my own.

"That's my girl," he praised me. I smiled weakly at him, feeling my cheeks stretch for the first time in a while. It felt foreign to me, but the only time I would ever smile would be when I was with Cato. He was the only person that made me smile. Not anyone from home made me as happy as he did.

I walked blindly into the hallway with Cinna guiding me. He led me to my preparatory room for the Victor's interview. The prep team squealed in delight and then shook with fear at the sight of me.. dirty tangled hair, dark bags under my eyes, and smelly breath.

They ushered me down onto a bed and stripped my clothes off of me. They began their work while I stare up at the ceiling, not feeling any shame for the first time ever.