Dead Set - Book 2 of a Zombie Reverse Harem

Chapter Twenty Two

CHAPTER TWENTY TWO

BLAKE SANDERS

I was a fucking idiot! Of course she took what I said earlier the wrong way, why wouldn't she?! I could see it in her eyes when she'd flinched away from my touch after I'd said it. I know I've fucked up, I'm not good with words. I didn't mean that I didn't want him to be a monster like her because I don't think of her that way. At all. I see her as the beautifully strong and vibrant woman that I am head over heels in love with. I'm the monster. I'm the one that keeps hurting her over and over and I hate myself for making her question her place within our family.

Crouching down beside her as she comes down from her frenzy, the wild, crazed look in her eyes being replaced by mortification and shame. I just want to pull her into my arms and love her until there is no further doubt in her mind that her place is with us no matter what my stupid mouth may say in the future.

I reach out to pull her into me. Pain slices my chest as she scuttles away from my reach on the tiled floor, pressing her back against the wall.

"Stay back!" She warned. My heart splitting in two at the notion that she could even think that I would hurt her. Yes, I may have been careless with my words but when have I ever given her reason to think that I could physically hurt her. You threw her to the floor! Damian unhelpfully reminds me. Seemingly still pissed at my treatment of our girl and I don't blame him. Even though I didn't show it at the time, I had never been as ashamed of myself as I was that morning when I'd tossed her to the ground like yesterday's garbage. It was one of the reasons that I kept pushing her away. I was terrified that Damian was going to be the one to hurt her when in reality, he had done nothing but claim her from the start and it was I who had taken it too far. I had never physically hurt a woman in my life... Not until that morning.

Hanging my head and sinking down on to my knees, shame spiralled through me as I relived that moment on repeat in my head. The perfection of her body on mine in those tiny little black booty shorts as she rithed against mine and then the look of hurt and shock on her face as I tossed her to the ground with way too much force that would have been unneccessary if it had been a fucking grown man on top of me, let alone a dainty little thing like her!

"I don't want to hurt you!" My head snapped up at her declaration. Open mouthed at the direction of her thoughts. She wasn't scared of me. She was scared of herself. She didn't want to hurt me! The one who had only cut through a hundred of those zombie fuckers yesterday, as if they were hot butter. The fear and horror stretched across her pale and beautiful face snapped my reserve, Closing the distance, I yanked her from her scrunched up position on the floor, pulling her into my arms so her thighs straddled my hips.

The moment my arms wrapped around her, she buried her face into the crook of my neck. I wasn't afraid of her. She wouldn't hurt me. She couldn't even if she tried. I would happily let her tear me to bits if it was what she wanted. But I knew that it wasn't. She would kill herself before she purposefully harmed even a hair on any of our heads. Which is what made her statement even more ridiculous to me. Yes, she may have been caught up in a feeding frenzy when she bit Jay but that was just the blood. She wasn't trying to kill him, she was trying to feed and the blood lust had overshadowed the consequences of taking too much. I was surer of that than I was my own name!

"You are not a monster, Princess." I spoke with every ounce of honesty in my being, hoping it projected into my words enough for her to believe what I was saying so there was no doubt in her mind. "You didn't want to hurt him. Did you even realize that you were?" I knew the answer but she needed to come to the realization on her own. My words weren't enough. People only ever listened to the bad that is spewed at them. Never believing the good. I could sit here and tell her how amazing she is for the next three days but it wouldn't offset the doubt my earlier words had inspired within her this morning.