Unknowingly Halal (lawful)

56. She lost everything.

Assalamualaikum.

Hey guys.

early update😍

*******

Sameer's POV,

Yeah..." She took a deep breath blinking her eyes. "I tried to leave you. I tried to ran away again and again but you always found me. And caged me, and then the revelation of our marriage makes me bitter. I thought if I was reminded married to someone else then you could never win but fate was in your side. After everything you did, you were still getting everything. Your love, your wife. And then came your child. And my hate for you increased. In all those, I was the one who was suffering seeing the man who ruined me was happy. And I wanted nothing more than to destroy you just like you did. I wanted to hurt you just like you hurt me."

She paused wiping her falling tears but it kept rolling down causing my eyes to moisten. She looks so broken and I wanted to comfort her but I know she wanted to let it out everything. She needed this.

"Yes I hated my pregnancy, why wouldn't I? I was pregnant after rape." I fisted my hands clenching my jaw tightly.

I don't want to hear this.

"That time only hate was in my heart for you. And being pregnant with your forced child makes me bitter. My first child was not conceived out of love but forced. I... I honestly wanted to hate your baby cause I already decided after the birth I will leave you. But how could I hate her when she was growing inside me? Her heart was beating inside me. Every now and then she makes me know about her existence." She turns to me with a smile on her face "You... You know that.., that feeling was so beautiful sameer, I spend a sleepless night with my daughter. I've often talked to her unknowingly and she... She never failed to respond. I eventually, fall in love with her. But couldn't back off my decision. If that time I had to give up then I could've never faced myself. I could never be satisfied. A burden of not having justice will always be on my shoulder. I could never forgive you. I forgive you the moment I punished you. I felt the burden left me. But with that new burden settled on my shoulder. The burden of leaving my daughter, The burden of my incomplete love and I realised that the burden of not having justice would've worth it contemplating the burden of not having my family. Not having both of you in my life." A painful sob escapes her mouth with tears. I took a sharp breath to hold back my emotions. Her words and tears were piercing my hearts.

"You think I was happy leaving you? No! I was never happy. I left inaaya for you. I knew you love her more than me and you needed her most. I kill my happiness of having my daughter, my first child just for you. I chose to be suffered without her just for you. So you can have her. You can live with her. You can be happy with her. Sameer you had inaaya, you had a part of me. But I? I had nothing I didn't have you. Neither our daughter. I was alone even after sarmad came I was still incomplete. I was never happy. I never stop loving you. I never slept peacefully after leaving you until the night at the hospital I got my daughter and The night I spent in our room after that small lovemaking" she smiles a little wiping her tears and looks at me. "You kept asking why I play with your feelings? Why I left you? Why I destroy your life, your daughter's life?  Why I did all that?" She asked her eyes to become hard. "You only think about yourself. You think about Your daughter. Only you from the beginning. Sameer wanted Adi. He got his Adi. Samer wanted his wife Adiba to be with him he caged her against her will. Sameer wanted Adiba to forgive and forget everything and accept him and his daughter. What wanted Adiba? No one cares"

She laughed. A painful laughed. "My Chacha Chachi play with my feelings. Destroy my life. You play with me. You destroy me but when I wanted some peace when I wanted to have justice everyone is calling me heartless mother. Why? Cause that time also I think about you" she pointed at me. "I think about you that's why I leave her. But I become a heartless bitch, a villain because of my one decision and sameer become a victim who had to suffer all those years. I was also suffering but who cares? No one. I know I was not fully right, But I was not fully wrong either." I stood up not having enough energy to hear her anymore. She makes me feel I was wrong. Certainly, I was. She pointed many thinks I ignored till now because of my selfishness. She was right. I only think about myself. She was becoming right and I was wrong and I didn't want this. I didn't want to feel guilty.