Chapter 47: Scars and tears

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Theodore sat down on the couch while I fetched my sewing kit from my bedroom.  It was only meant to be an excuse to talk to him again, that would be hard if I couldn't look at him. Well I technically still could if he was shirtless, but that would be too awkward for out first conversion in two years.

But when I got back he was already taking his shirt off. My eyes found themselves locked on his chest. He had abs now, but it was hard to tell with all the scars scattered on his chest.

Scars that were my fault. I titled my head down and tired to contain my tears. 

"Maria, are you okay?" Theodore asked. I nodded yes without looking up at him.

"Then why aren't you looking at me?"

"Because it would be improper," 

"Oh," he didn't say anything after that, and just gave me his shirt.

I sat down on the couch across from him and started expecting his shirt. I wasn't as familiar with men's clothes as I was with women's, I but I could at the very least get rid of the puff out of the sleeves.  

As I threaded the needle and started working, I sent subtle looks his way. He was staring at the fire, looking lost. I took a closer look at his scars. They were all over his chest, too many to for someone to live with. I can still recall the sent of blood coming from his wounds. So, so much blood, covering everything. 

"OW!" I said. I was distracted, and the needle pricked my finger. It was starting to bleed.

"Let me help," Theodore said, coming closer to me.

"No it's alright, you don't have to worry abou-" he took my hand with the hurt finger. A dim light came out of the wound, and the blood and pain disappeared. He let go of my hand and I held the finger in front of my face. 

"When did you get healing powers?" I asked.

"After that day," Theodore said. "After I recovered, I was able to heal wounds,"

I lowered my hand and looked at his chest again. "Does it still hurt?"

". . . sometimes,"

I broke down crying. "I'm sorry Theodore, I'm so sorry. It's all my fault, I should've, should've been able to heal you quicker, to make sure your okay. I'm so sorry,"

"It's not your fault I got hurt Maria," he pulled me into his arms, but I barely registered it.

"But it is my fault! I tried to save you but I couldn't do it without help. You could've died because of me! My parents tired to kill your family because of me! I couldn't, I couldn't save you Theodore, even when you were dying in my arms, I couldn't save you!" I cried as I looked him directly in his eyes. 

"Maria-" he started. "Don't blame yourself for what happened to me. I should've been smarter, I shouldn't have go into the forest by myself. And it's not your fault for what your parents tried to do," he hugged me closer but I pulled away.

"Don't blame myself? DON'T BLAME MYSELF? YOU TOLD ME TO BLAME MYSELF!" I yelled and stood up. 

"I spent a year looking for you after my parents made you leave! A YEAR! And when I finally found you, you told me to leave, that you never wanted to see me ever again! That it was my fault that you and your family had to go away!"

"And I did, I did Theodore. I left you alone, even thought you were the only person I had left. And now you're back here, with healing powers of all things, and you just want me stop doing the thing you told me too?"

I finally looked down into his eyes. He was crying, and quickly looked down. Good.

"I'm sorry Maria. I didn't think you would've been so hurt by it, that you would've cared so much."

"Why would I care? I was told by my only friend, my first friend, that they never wanted to see me again, how would that not hurt?" I asked.

"I cared about you Theodore. If I didn't, why would go try to find you? I just don't understand why you, why you said those things to me,"

I felt deflated after that. All those things I've thought of over the years, came tumbling out, I just felt numb.

"It was my parents idea," Theodore said quietly

"What?"

"They told if you ever found me again, that I should reject you. They didn't anymore problems from your parents, so you and I couldn't be friends anymore. I didn't want to say those things Maria, I really didn't,"

"Then why did you? You could've just told me the truth, I would've listened."

"Would you Maria, would you?" he said looking up at me.

"You already saved my life at that, and stood up against your parents to save me and my family once they found out. Maria, you threatened to kill them, not just threaten, you used your poison magic against your own father when he tried to stop you from helping me,"

He stood up and walked toward me. "We were too close to each other for own good. I'm sorry,"

I hugged him. "I still don't forgive you," I hugged him tighter. "But thank you for telling me why,"

He hugged me back, and we stayed like that for a while. It felt good to go back to something like this. Everything was finally perfect.

Until someone knocked on the door.


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