ch22 - soft

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The air felt unbreathable, thick with soundless tension. I have half the mind to beg to switch rooms again. But the other half knows I need to take action. I am well aware that Tsukishima is not asleep either, despite however still he may be. I know he's not.

No time like 2a.m.

"So, what's wrong?" I finally ask after a few minutes of trying to get comfortable in the futon. It's hard to get comfortable when the air feels so heavy.

"Is there something wrong?" Ah, so we're still in denial. It must have been something I did then, if he doesn't want to say anything.

Like a wise best friend once said; if you do nothing, nothing will happen.

I sit up in my futon. I shouldn't really give an apology lying down, "Sorry, it must of been me. I messed something up, I know it."

"No!" I look over, he has sat up too. Pale moonlight cast on him. He looks surreal. "No no no. It's not you at all." Much to my surprise, he slips out of his bed and sits on the edge of mine, next to me. He looks me in the eyes. "You are wonderful, you didn't do anything wrong."

This assurance lifts a weight off my chest. I offer a soft smile.

He's about to get up and go back to bed, I grab his hand and stop him. We've come this far, I need to find out what's troubling him, "Hey, something is wrong and I need you to tell me. I wouldn't know otherwise."

His gaze shifts, looking everywhere but at me. I wait. I let him take his time as he tries to find the words.

He looks down at the hand I am still loosely holding. His hand shifts so that our fingers intertwine. His voice comes out, bearly a whisper, "I'm just scared."

"Of what?"

"Love, I think I'm in love and it's frightening."

"I don't know if I should be flattered or concerned right now." That does the trick. His eyes shot up at me in a look of I-am-being-open-with-my- feelings-how-dare-you-joke-right-now. Then the look melts away when he sees me. I look at him with great softness and wonder. Thumb rubbing over the back of his hand, I breathe my next words, " I think I'm in love too.

But in love there is trust and in love there is vulnerability. You have every right to fear.

But I hope you trust yourself enough to be vulnerable with me. I would never turn on you.

In loving you I am just as vulnerable, and I know you would never turn on me.

But take your time. There is no need to rush. I will be with you as you learn to trust again."

I hug him. Or he hugs me. Or we met in the middle. It doesn't matter.

"Thanks." He mudders into my shoulder. "That was so cheesy."

"Hey, it's 2a.m. I'm allowed to be cheesy."

"Then I get to say something cheesy too." He doesn't say anything. Instead he topples his weight on me and we fall back. I'm laying back in my bed, he is laying next to me with limbs tangled and our noses almost touching.

"I have never wanted this before. To hold and to touch. But with you is so easy, and it's-"

"Frightening?"

"Wonderful."

We moved closer. Only a few inches, but it made all the difference as we filled the space between us. I close my eyes to make room to feel. And oh, did I feel.

I felt apologies and forgiveness. I felt tenderness and vulnerability. I felt his love, all in this sweet short kiss. 

"So sweet of you to leave your bed for a futon just to kiss me."

"I left my bed because I don't have my glasses and I couldn't see shit."

Laughter escapes both of us. And when we settle. I look at him and I see him. He is soft. It will not show on the outside. But he is soft and he knows it. So he protects himself.

But when all is set right and he doesn't hide. Oh goodness, he is soft. So pure and loving.

We don't speak another word. We don't need to. We settle for losing ourselves in each other's eyes until they close and we sleep.


As I open my eyes I first thing I notice is the morning light temporarily blinding me. Next thing I noticed was the lack of feeling in some of my limbs. Then I noticed the cause of the lack of feeling in my limbs.

That's cause was a boy. A beautiful boy. A beautiful boy sleeping only inches away, and who is honestly too heavy to be laying on my arm.

How did I even fall asleep like this?

I carefully pull my arm out from under him. Pain sharply fills my arm as blood flows back into my arm. The sleeping boy stirs, eyes lazily open.

"Good morning" He says, sleep heavy in his voice. He glances down at the arm I am cradling, "You ok?"

"No, you crushed my arm and now there is no blood in it and I'll have to get it amputated."

"I can feel it too"

He reaches out and holds my hand in his. He brings my hand up to his lips, placing a soft kiss on my knuckles. I simply melt.

"Better?" Has asks, my hand still in his.

"Nope. Still dead."

"I guess we'll have to visit the hospital today. This will hurt." He gives an exaggerated gasp, "you won't be able to paint!"

"Look at that," I flex my fingers, hand still slightly numb, "all better."

He lets out a small chuckle and a light smile. He allows himself to be soft. Is a gorgeous look on him.

When people drown, it's always in blue. But his eyes are a honeyed brown and I still find myself slipping deep.


"Oh, thank goodness it all turned out ok. I was ready to go dig a hole, jump in it and die of embarrassment" Yamaguchi comments when he sees our hands intertwined with each other as the three of us walk to the station.

Well, it was the hand holding thing or maybe it was the shirt I was wearing. Which was not mine, it was Tsukki's. Well, now it's mine.

We wait in front of the station for a few minutes before I spot who I'm waiting for. I wave my arms to usher her over. She spots me.

"Hey, ok let me introduce you. Guys, this is Mai. Tsukki, you have already met her, Yams," I stop my sentence when I turn to Yamaguchi. He's looking at Mai with wide eyes and flushed cheeks. I look over to Mai, and her attention is on no one else but the freckled boy she had just met. Oh?

Drawn to you // Tsukishima x reader  -  soulmate AU!Where stories live. Discover now