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in which gale grace gets thrown into a prophecy he was not ready for. he'll be fine. maybe.
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summary.
be better. you're not good enough. be better. those words echoed in gale grace's mind, burnt into his thoughts like the eagle tattoo on his arm, seemingly everlasting and perpetual as the days of his life went on. the saying seemingly started long ago, the only thing he remembers from his past that was like a locked door with a lost key. he remembers holding his twin brother jason's hand, two small little children wandering the woods and places they had no business being in at their age wondering why mommy did what she did. that's all they remembered, the two boys watching their mother run off, tears streaming down her face as her heels clicked on the concrete with each step she took. "it's alright," she said. "wait here. i will be back for you, my loves. i will see you soon."
it was a lie. it was all a lie, not a white lie, it was a lie that gale considered to be the root of his problems. why would mommy abandon me? the young boy would think. was i not good enough? why did she abandon us? as much as jason liked to deny it to keep gale's spirits up, he saw right through jason's facade. it affected them both, so deep that they themselves didn't even know how. jason vowed to follow the rules and keep the promises he made so no one would abandon him like beryl grace did to him and gale. he met the expectations set for him by lupa and the higher ups at camp jupiter, so far that sometimes he felt like his life was out of his control, so far that he felt like a ghost in a body that wasn't his. no kid should feel that way. gale was a different story. his mother's unbroken promises sent him off the deep end, in a way. those words were like poison, infecting and poisoning his mind with thoughts that sent his self confidence down the deep end. he was useless. he felt useless.
