Once Upon A Prostitute

CHAPTER 5 - GIRL IN THE MIRROR

Journal entry
I take it back. Fate is not trying to balance out anything. Fate is a bitch!

Seems like saturdays are the busy days at the diner. Most people just stop by on their way from the park, mall, or wherever they went off to hang out. It's a full house.

I've been working like a robot the whole day. My limbs are smart enough to carry out the usual motor functions but my mind is far away. I feel homesick, guilty, depressed, worthless, and a whole lot of other feelings I don't have a name for yet. While my nights are filled with dreams of my folly and terrors of the ring, my mornings are filled with self-loathing and regrets. Deep down, I long to speak to my dad, but I can't. Asides the fact that I still don't have a phone, I can't even face him right now. I'm too ashamed. After everything I did, I need to make things right, better. Something good has to come out of all of this somehow. The problem is I have no idea how.

'Mina are you okay?' Eve asked as I loaded a tray with some pastries from the oven. Of course, her detective eyes noticed. I have not said more than two words that weren't absolutely necessary.

''your brooding level is below zero today'', Matt quipped. He was kneading dough on the kitchen counter for another batch of cookies. We get the largest number of families and kids in on the weekends and they love our cookies.

'well..?' Eve raised an eyebrow.

'I'm fine', I forced a smile on my face. 'just feeling a little tired, that's all'

'you see why you should eat 3 times a day? I keep telling you to eat and you keep saying you're fine.' She scolded. She put a burger on a plate and pushed it in my direction. 'Eat.' She commanded. 'you're too skinny to be on a diet'.

I smiled. 'thank you, ma'am'.

She took the tray of pastries I just loaded and went to the customer's area. I looked at the burger. It looked yummy and nutritious, but I can't eat this now. My appetite has been really low of recent. Still, I took it. Eve would probably stand beside me and watch me eat that burger if I make a fuss.

'And remember your performance starts this Monday.' Matt said. 'Those flyers on the counter attest to that. You have to be on your A-game Miss Jaja.''

He had printed these flyers with bold letters that read - MUSIC AGAIN AT EVE'S CORNER. It had so many colours  that made it look like a rainbow. I cringed when I first saw it. Everyone was excited about it though. I was nervous as hell.

I chuckled dryly. 'yeah yeah, I hear you Mr. Greenwood'.

He rolled up a piece of dough and threw. It landed right on my forehead just as Eve re-entered the kitchen. No...he did not just do that. Matt was grinning like he had hit the center of a dart board. Well, wait for it dumbass. I picked it up to throw back.

'no no, no fights in my kitchen'', Eve yelled.

'he started it'. I said pointing to Matt who was still grinning.

'And you don't have to finish it.' She eyed the burger in my other hand. 'Take a break and eat, I'd handle it here'.

I took the burger and walked to the office. Eve had partitioned the only extra room in the diner into two offices. I and Matt shared one. It was where we kept our belongings, took our breaks, and put our feet up for some minutes. The other was for her. It was well set up like a real office with a desk, computer, and shelf of books.

I kept the burger on the table and sat on the chair. I rubbed the bridge of my nose and put my face in my hands resting my elbows on the table.

Fuck my life. I need a time machine. I need to do the last nine months over.