𝐂𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀 | ✔️

29 [PART 2]

sorry for the last upload, i got caught up with reading. i read 'the cheat sheet' and 'the silent patient' if u care lol.

CECILIA ADAMS

"what happened with mommy?" nate asks again as i hold his hand to cross the road to the hospital.

"mommy's fine nate." i tell him as we enter the hospital still holding hands.

"is sammy okay?" he asks as he's about to cry.

"samuel is fine as well." i smile comforting him.

"emmy?"

"emmy will be fine, bubs." i kiss his forehead and we walk to the waiting bay where tate and samuel are.

nate runs up to his mom and hugs her. "thank you so much, cece."

i smile and take a seat next to tate. "it's no problem, have you heard any news on emmy?"

"the doctor said she'll be allowed visitors really soon. they said the airbag damaged her more than the actual accident." she explained. she looked like she's been crying. "i'm gonna kill that motherfucker!"

she's referring to josh. i look over to samuel who is anxiously sitting down and tapping his foot, he feels my gaze and looks at me as well and his face softens a little. i, assuming tate sees this interaction.

"ya'll can go to the cafe downstairs and get milkshakes or something." tate offers. she grabs her wallet out and takes out a 2 $10 bills and hands it to samuel. "when you're done, i need you guys to take nate home."

samuel stands up. "no, i'm staying and i'm suffocating that son of a bitch until his head explodes."

he says it with full seriousness, not an ounce of exaggeration intended.

tate shakes her head. "cant kill him if i beat you to it." this causes samuel to smile a little and tate hugs him. "she'll be fine, baby." he hugs her back.

samuel pulls away and starts walking away, i'm assuming i'm supposed to follow him. nate stays with tate.

we enter the small café and take a seat in a booth. it's quiet.

"are you gonna apologise?" i suddenly say breaking the silence. i didn't mean to say that, i was just thinking it.

he looks up at me and then opens a menu completely ignoring me. i scoff silently. "you're a selfish dick."

"my 13 year old sister almost faced a life threatening accident all the while being groomed and you're concerned that i'm not apologising to you?" he rhetorically asks with genuine pain in his voice. "so if i'm a selfish dick for this, so be it. i'm a proud selfish dick."

oh.

i didn't realise how selfish i actually sounded, so i stay silent. he orders a water bottle and a chicken sandwich. i order nothing. i feel sick. i feel sick that i thought i could make him feel bad for me in a time where i am the least of his worries, and i don't blame him i'm for the least for it.

he finishes his sandwich and chugs the rest of the bottle. "you're not gonna get anything?"

i shake my head and we look into eachother's eyes. i wanna get lost in his eyes, sometimes when he looks at me it feels like there's a hole in my heart when he looks away. it feels impossible to bring words to describe how i feel about samuel. i know my thoughts on him aren't hatred, they never were but it was something awfully close to hatred; betrayal. he betrayed me, but he's here now. and i'm here for him.

he gives me a reassuring look. a look that explains that he forgives me. he understands my pain and where i'm coming from. i know he knows that i didn't mean to bring him down, yet i still feel shitty.

"i'm sorry, samuel."

he slowly blinks and nods. "i know, princess."

his name for me brings butterflies to my stomach and a flush of heat overcomes my cheeks.

sometimes i wonder if he's bipolar or not. or maybe i am. i'm not trying to be humorous and make a joke about mental illness, it just crosses my mind. how unbelievable is it that humans have such a change of feelings so fast?

samuels phone buzzes loudly interrupting our moment. he looks at it and answers it. "yeah? any news?!"

he pauses and listens followed by some "mhmm" 's and some "yeah" 's.

"alright, we're coming." he says to the other line and hangs up. he jerks his chin at me. "c'mon"

we walk to the waiting room where tate and nate aren't there anymore. i give a confused look to him. "we're allowed to see emmy."

"is she alright?" i ask.

he nods and leads me to the room she's in. she's conscious and she's responsive which is a VERY good sign. tate is currently holding her hand while talking to her and nate is sitting beside her drinking apple juice. samuel takes one look at her and walks out. i follow him.

"hey, what's wrong?" i ask following him as he's pacing outside of the door.

"samuel!?"

he keeps pacing.

i grab his wrist and he stops. "what's on your mind?" i ask softly.

he just looks at me for a moment and then answers, "i wanna know what room joshua is in."

oh no.

i suddenly get the urge to help him. i know for a fact the doctors won't allow him to see josh, but i'll help him if it means it'll take the stress off samuels shoulders. surely samuel can't get in trouble for causing a little more damage to josh.

"samuel i-"

"don't convince me to not do this." he says interrupting me. "please."

"i'll help you. i'll help you as long as you don't get in trouble.

he cups my face and smiles. "of course."